[seanmarr]

This particular GP has his own diabetic clinic - I feel sorry for his patients, though judging by the time I was booked in as a guest most of them are retired so wouldnt be worried by the fact that they cant concentrate for longer than an episode of 'Diagnosis Murder'! I am so glad I turned down the 'opportunity' to join his clinic.

I am on refereal to a proper endocrinologist, but I last went to their clinic in January last year and my next appointment isn't due until March, and despite trying I cannot get an earlier one. The hospital do not provide anything for diabetics unless they are inpatients, which is why I got referred to the PCT Diabetic Nursing Service when I tried that.

At the end of the day I can count the number of times I have seen a GP in the past five years (ie excluding just going there to collect a prescription on one hand and two fingers, with only three issues
3 times in the past couple of months with the total loss of control I am experiencing
3/4 times in february/March when I had the flu and nothing they gave me helped
2 times in the previous year because of an allergy to something (still don't know what)

I.e. a total of ten times, which I think is very low. In fact, the first time I went there in (I think) March 2005 the nurse practitioner didnt really bother with my problem (an allergy rash) and spent longer taking my blood pressure, medical hisotry etc. so that the practice could get their QoF money. I really do not think it is much to expect that when I need help, they give it to me, and not just decide its too difficult so if they leave it six months it will get better on its own with a little tweaking.

The fact he mentioned 'start again' made sense to me, its what I want to do, but I don't feel that I am starting again because I am still having the same amount of food, the same rapid acting insulin, the same rapid doses, and a similar regime - surely if things are this bad then it needs a whole change!?!

If I change GP all my notes will get sent to a new one, so I will still be left with the fact that the 'problem is largely in my head' on my record. There arent many options around here, the surgery I am under has 18000 patients, there are two others that might take me on but I think one of them is full and the other has a reputation for being pretty poor. One alternative I have got is to see another GP at the practice - I was talking to one of the dispensers at work who described this particular GP as being 'nasty', but she mentioned another GP who was 'nice' and might actually listen to what I am saying, but again I've got the problem she will look at my notes. Then, I will most likely get questioned as to why I saw this other doctor, why do I keep going behind his back etc, and I think it is highly unlikely that this other doctor would challenge what my current doctor says because he is the 'lead' GP.

The problem may be in my head but that is most likely due to the fact that I am under a lot of stress (housemoving, parents marital breakdown, brothers drug/alcohol habits, mountain of uni work to catch up on) and that the constant highs and lows mean I cant even think straight, and that I now get so worried about getting high and low because I cant feel the difference so I just constantly test...

And I'm currently 16.8 after being high all day and am showing a 'Trace' of ketones.