[Subby]

In a similar vein to Cormac Doyle, I suffered depression-like symptoms that were definitely largely contributed by unstable sugars. This went on for years. On going on the pump a year ago and a huge improvement in stability (I have very poor absorption with injections, partly explaining why I was so incredibly unstable despite every of effort), my natural bounciness of mind and mood - and indeed in some ways, my actual personality - returned quite quickly. For the first time in 12 years.

Previous to DX I was well adjusted and robust of emotion and mind. With, it must be said, tendancies to think quite differently from the norm or engage in a lot of creative process - which to me suggests I might have been more susceptible to issues given the effects of high BGs.

For the first few years of unstable diabetes I think my mind resisted a lot of the effects - but it sure wore me down. By the 4th or 5th year I did not feel myself and life was a major struggle. I was diagnosed with clinical depression, and once or twice I experienced at times of particularly bad BG levels, what can only be described as frightening signs of schizophrenia coming on. I did do research at the time, it was a particular and slightly strange set of "depression" symptoms I was exhibiting. Can't remember the exact details, happy to think about it if interest.

Now, whether the BG's were solely instigating these effects, or setting off some deep buried tendancies, I have no idea. Have to suspect a bit of both.

I tried a number of anti depressants from each "family" over the course of a year and a half and each and every one gave me psychological and physical side effects and definitely made things a whole lot worse - finally when the last slowed my thoughts to a snails pace I could observe after a few weeks, I gave that experiement away. I spent my time "feeling" I was not depressed, feeling spurts of normality and undercurrents of normal motivation... but showing strong outward signs of depression, this constant wave of depressive feeling effects in my head. I can't explain how frustrating that was, year after year, especially in going in to bat for myself with drs etc, who would point to my issues and say "you are depressed" and I would say "but underneath, I really feel fine... worn thin, desperate, but well adjusted"... and of course the inexorable skepticism towards a depressed person protesting against their depression. Nor can I say how strange it was to have my suspicions completely confimed, a few days after getting on the pump (and breaking an approx 6 hour cycle of instability for the first time in many years), that it primarily was the BG's, all along.

Not only depression, but cognitive ability like memory was also serverely affected by about the 10th year for me. I could no longer remember phone numbers, that kind of thing. That kind of memory ability is taking longer to come back to me, if it does. It has improved in a day to day sense, but I still can't remember my number! That middle range memory... does seem quite damaged...

I believe there is quite a bit of research linking diabetes, or high/fluctuating BG's, to depression and psychological effects. I can't suggest where to start, a web search might help.