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Banshee Blood

Posted by mystiquarte , 10 January 2017 · 45 views

Meds: Byetta 10mcg 2/24 and Lantus 54 units 1/24

fbg: 7.7
after breakfast: 10.4
before lunch: 9.9
after lunch: 9.2
before tea: ?
after tea: ?
bedtime: ?

fbg: 8.9

I haven't being doing to well lately...crying myself to sleep most nights and just feeling empty. I've been trying to not eat, I still 'have to' eat I'm diabetic but I get around that by eating the least amount of calories I possibly can and I still feel awful, so guilty. Then I end up feeling weak and shaking a few days later in which case I make a meal and end up eating a bit too much and feeling full then the shame starts and it repeats...it's like my ed has found a diabetic loop hole. The foods that don't cause problems with eating them are salads and banana with frozen fruit they are 'safe' but everything else is problematic. I just feel so alone and empty...avoiding everything, I just want to hide away from it all.

I have been sleeping in, if I could get away with sleeping all day I would...but one thing its just too bloody hot. My fast blood glucose has been lower when I do sleep in, higher when I don't...so thats a thing, I think my insulin is broken and I need a new one. I found out the name of the insulin I was given in hospital...so I can tell my Endo. Counting down the days man...how long to I see him? I might have to double check with them.

I wish I could look into the coming months and see if 'this' what I've going through resolves and I am not feeling like this...it's been worse over the past 3-4 weeks and I just don't want to do it anymore.

Listening: "milk it" Nivana From the muddy banks of the wishkah

Random question: Who's your favourite Villain/Baddie?
the dark knight!

January 2017

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