Transplant List/being depressed

[Littlebit63_99]

My signature tells everyone that I just went thru colon surgery.

The University of Minnesota is having great success with this. Dr. David Sutherland(world renowned transplant surgeon{I am soooooo lucky})
told Jeff and I that of the diabetics he has seen that have been dx with "gastric parisis" 90 o/o of them don't have it. Only 10 o/o do. The 90 have been mis-diagnosed. He was right about me. My surgery was a TOTAL success. I realize that this is a graphic topic, but, for me, my stomache/intestinal nerve damage was controlling my life. And, I have to say, not in pleasant ways.

Anywho, back to the reason for this post. I have been on another medical leave (from the list) while I healed up from surgery. My med leave was to last untill Aug 1st.

I called the U yesterday and asked to be re-activated. I'm having real trouble dealing with the limits of low bs unawareness.

3 weeks ago, I went to Applebee's for lunch with my two children. (Girls, 22 and 24) I woke up in an ambulance. I have been afraid to even drive since then............haven't been able to shop, clean, walk, Lord help me, do a **** thing for the past 2 1/2 years.

I'm soooooooooooo freaking depressed!!!!!!!!! I can't stand it!!!!!!!

I have been one three different meds. I have an appt with my endo next Mon to see if he has a magic combination. What I need is the transplant and a break from this ****. Sorry, kids.........the reality is that after you get alot of complications...........this disease sucks!!!

Now, the important lesson here, of course is TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF
Keep those A1C's down. And, avoid stress. Gosh, I can't stress that one enough.(pun intended) The damage to the nerve system from stress is horrendous.

My downfall was the life I had. Two beautiful kids who needed soooo much. I was a single mom till I met Jeff. And, my youngest has a mild form of Spina Bifida...............very stressful life. I would do it all again for them if I had to or could..............but, I would have learned to meditate to handle the stress better.

LEARN FROM ME, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do any of you deal with depression?????????????????????

I know of one of us that does, we keep in touch with each other, and I care about that person very much. I am wondering how common this is with us???????????????????

[JediSkipdogg]

I hope all is going well with you and that you stand strong. Remember though, no transplant has been fully successful. I think only 1 or 2 are currently lasting past 5 years now, and they are still taking massive amounts of anti-rejection drugs, which those themselves have many harmful side effects.

I understand you are one of the few that are all over the place with your numbers, and a transplant would help. But remember, currently, it's only a band-aid for the solution and you will (99% sure) go back on insulin again.

I've had minor depression before, but I just look at the wonderful friends I have out there and all the help I can give others and think I still have alot to give. I can't quit now. So stand tall, stand strong, we're all here for you when you need us.

[TxTechKimmy]

Hi Liz, I too have suffered from gastroparesis in the past. Boy..that was NO fun. I lost weight but that diet was not one I recommend. My primary care wasn't sure why I was throwing up all the time. He even said that with my family history, it could be cancer. Well..that sent me into a tailspin. Talk about depression ..stress...fear. I finally was able to get in with a gastro specialist and he confirmed it was gastroparesis. I'm one of the lucky ones, in that my gastro has mysteriosly gone away. I think when you have a chronic illness like ours, being depressed at times comes with the territory.
Have you thought about seeing someone about your depression?

[Littlebit63_99]

Jedi, Kimberly,

First, thanx! I know I have friends here......that helps.

Jedi, you should go to http://TransplantBuddies.org

My endo just told me of a pancreas/kidney patient of his that is out 22 years and going strong. She has had two children and three surgeries. Probably....C-sections and such from pregnancies. Doesn't sound so scary to me. Certainly that chance is better than what I deal with day after day. If you only knew.

Just, please educate yourself...........there is info out there. And, I have been on one of the anti-rejection drugs. No prob. Tx patients don't take "massive" amounts. You get a large dose for the five days following tx, and then you take smaller doses of two drugs. Sometimes there are others, but, not often. Mostly just Cell-cept and Pro-graf. And, yes, they like all drugs have potential side effects.

Since, I can't feel my lows, I have no choice. I qualified for a tx ove 10 years ago. I waited as long as I could for the anti-rejection drugs to progress and become safer. Now, IF my tx fails. Dr. Sutherland told us he would get me into the pig islet cell program. So, I have nothing to lose. Those don't require anti-rejection drugs......but, they are 5 years out from human trials. I won't live that long without my tx. I almost died three weeks ago. My children got my tongue out of the back of my throat in time. Thank God I wasn't with strangers.

Yes, I have talked to people. Dr.s. One even told me if I believed in God enough, I might get cured. Didn't go back to him. The last one told me that it was ok to be sick.......it's not my fault. WELL, DUH!!!!!! Sorry, but geeze, what is wrong with these people. I may have to talk to someone again. Up to endo.....I see him about this on Monday. Sounds like he refers to somebody he is pretty confident with. And, it's other diabetics he's referring, so, might help. I won't say "no" But, I can't help being sceptical. Kind of like you with the tx, Jedi. I do understand. But, alot of those folks on that tx site are 10-18 years out. And going strong. Some don't. I think the tricks are to apply before you are at deaths door. And to wait for a good match.

Thanxxxx............... I needed to "chat" today. (((((hugs, everyone))))))

[archimeech]

Liz, I'm glad your colon surgery went well. I'm hoping for you and always wonder how you're doing. Have you thought of going to Mexico for the islet transplant? I know it's expensive, but I was just wondering. Take care, sweetheart. I'm hoping something can be done soon enough to help affect your situation as well as everyone else's on here.

[rzrbks]

Do any of you deal with depression?????????????????????

I know of one of us that does, we keep in touch with each other, and I care about that person very much. I am wondering how common this is with us???????????????????

One of the most common problems facing people with Diabetes is, in fact, depression.

I deal with it by visiting the shrink/counselor periodically but my main source of relief is books.

I have a small but constant set of books that I read and re-read and re-re-read. Example: I have read the complete Hobbit and LOTR series over 50 times(58 at last count). I have aprox. 45-60 books that I just start reading again when I feel the need. Kind of like visiting an old and trusted friend.


Oh, yeah. Golf, for me, is also a great source of having a thing to focus on outside myself. And, to be honest, I have friends who are looking for new things I can obsess about.


Plus I always stay active in state Party Politics.

[beveykin]

At times I get really low and just burst out crying for no reason. That hasn't happened for a while now I guess that's because I am sttled and happy with myself-so stay positive

[Lynne1]

I'm currently seeking treatment for depression. The depression isn't due to my diabetes. However, I eat carby foods when I'm stressed/depressed and it makes my bgs go up more than I'd like and then I get tired and more depressed. It's hard to get out of that cycle.

Do you all find that it takes FOREVER to get an appointment with a psychologist or psychiatrist? I don't feel the need to go to the er for my depression, but would like to be treated sooner than July 18th! Argh!

[mg_2204]

Hello Liz! :hello:

I am SO GLAD your op went well and that you are healing and feeling better. You deserve that total success so much!!! x 1000 :thumbsup:

I know it must be so frustrating to be on medical leave from the transplant list but... a problem has been taken care of. :congrats: Now to the next! You can only take so much at a time you know.

It is so true what you say about stress. Stress is very powerful. Can make you very ill, can even kill you. But when raising children, it's hard to tell them wait! Mom has to rest and relax. Yeah right! Women have an unhealthy tendency to put their needs last. But on the brigther side, your children are old enough now to take good care of you, to pamper you once in a while :)

Depression. I hear that indeed it is common in people with diabetes. I hate the disease with a passion. The disease is a big pain where the sun doesn't shine. No wonder some of us are affected by depression. Who would'nt??!? You'ge got a lot on your plate to deal with. Don't feel a failure because you are depressed too. You are not. It's just too much for one person I think. I often think of you Liz and always hope for the best. I will not cease to hope either. Hope is powerful too. And contrary to stress, hope is powerful in good ways only.

The very best to you! Great big hug.

[Littlebit63_99]

Gosh! I just love everyone on this site.!!!!!!

Arch, Marie, Lynne, Rzrbks, it's soooooooo good to read the responses.

I went shopping today.............had to eat way too much to be out and about alone.............but, oh the feel of a new purchase. Or old. I bought an antique painting for our living room!!!!!!!!!!!! YAYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!

Now, I will run high tonight cuz I had to overload to prevent lows while I was out. Ughhhhg.

I did so need to talk today. Thanx everyone!!!!

I met a diabetic at the last sale I went to who doesn't take care of himself.

Can you hear me????????????? I bet he still does. No, seriously, I gave he and his wife the website addy and my phone # for info. And, lots of attitude.

People just don't know what they have till it's gone. And your health is NOT something you can get back.

Take care all.............Love,
Liz

[JacquiS]

One of the most common problems facing people with Diabetes is, in fact, depression.

I deal with it by visiting the shrink/counselor periodically but my main source of relief is books.

I have a small but constant set of books that I read and re-read and re-re-read. Example: I have read the complete Hobbit and LOTR series over 50 times(58 at last count). I have aprox. 45-60 books that I just start reading again when I feel the need. Kind of like visiting an old and trusted friend.


Oh, yeah. Golf, for me, is also a great source of having a thing to focus on outside myself. And, to be honest, I have friends who are looking for new things I can obsess about.


Plus I always stay active in state Party Politics.
I deal with depression ALL the time in a big way. It's one of my biggest battles. The forum is wonderful...place to vent..place to get it all out. Lots of support here!!

[am1977]

Liz... you know we all want the best for you. I am keeping my fingers crossed (and my toes) that everything turns out well.

I, unfortunately, do let stress get to me at times. And I firmly believe that it takes a toll on one's health. I actually believe that stress started creeping into my life from childhood and the stress has just gotten more as I have gotten older. I try to find ways to cope with whatever's the issue at the time, but I'd be lying if I said that stress doesn't get me down at time and, yes, even depressed :frown:.

As for depression, I think sometimes I suffer from a mild case of it :bawling:... I guess sometimes it's hard to avoid. However, I do know that this forum and having loved ones around me helps. Sometimes being surrounded by those who love and care about you is the best medicine. I hope you know how much we care about you here :love:.

So, again, please know that we are keeping you in our thoughts and we will be wishing only the best for you! And, do keep us posted with everything :top:

[gettingby]

Liz,
I tried to PM you but it said your inbox is full. I'll try again in a day or so. :D

[KickStart101]

Hi Liz: We sure do understand why you are depressed, you have every right.
For one reason or another most of us have been there or are there(although probably
not as bad reasons as you). There are enough bad things going on in the world and
perhaps in our lives that are depressing enough but to have to deal with stupid, even
life-threatening disease(s) on top is just totally unfair and over-whelming, at the very
least.

I'm certain many have taken to heart your important and wise message.

I went off my anti-depressants some yrs. ago. I wasn't depressed with Diabetes(occasional
anger, yes)
but I was depressed after I got RA and then
the lows of Diabetes, then the Hypothyroidism, then the Asthma and a few other do-dads.
I found life very busy, draining and over-whelming.(There were a few times I thought about.....). But I managed somehow to successfully get past all the bad parts, yrs. ago(okay 2005 was a bad, sad yr.)but I've managed again to pull myself togather and am feeling pretty good except for the chronic fatigue and(some days horrific) pain of RA. (Still
working on that one. :D )I just don't have the patience to dwell on all this foolishness. I prefer to spend my time enjoying the good parts and events
in Life. That's the Best I can do for me and my Family and Friends. (That
does include looking after the regimens of my diseases, of course).
Anyways, sorry for babbling, never my intention. I am again thrilled with your
sussessful recovery :) :) :) and as before you are always in my thoughts and prayers
that you will have Terrific results WHEN you have your transplant.

You are a Great Mom and your Daughters love and appreciate you very much.
I know you are too "busy" ;) to post sometimes but I DO know that you will see this.
Take Good Care Girl, we Love Ya. 0x0x