Advice On Dealing With An Uncooperative Type 2

[gettingby]

I need some help here. I work with a lady who has type 2. Everyday she sits down and eats a honeybun (tons of carbs) plus she is always eating chips and pb crackers. She complains every day that her doc has told her that if she doesn't get her bgs down, she will have to go on insulin (currently no meds). She asked me "What else can I do other than what I'm doing now". Well, after hearing this on a daily basis for weeks at a time and telling her what she needs to do, I lost it this last time. I told her "If you would stop sitting there in that d@@n chair eating all those carb filled snacks, then maybe you wouldn't be having this problem, Lay off the d@@n honeybuns too".
How do you continue to deal with someone like this and still keep your cool? I've had about all I can take of telling her what she needs to do and even showing her in books and such what needs to be done, then have her just ignore my advice and continue on as she is.

Rant off !!

[princesslinda]

I have the same problem with a co-worker. She's on 3 different meds for diabetes and still eats whatever she wants. She was also told insulin was her next step....and now she "manipulates" her meds, taking more when she eats more, to keep her A1C at an acceptible level.

It is frustrating...esp. when you are trying to be very diligent with your own control.

Her philosophy is that she wants to be like everyone and not have to worry about what she eats and drinks. She young, only 32 and pretty much takes her meds and does what she pleases. I'm sure it will all catch up with her at some point.

I don't know that there is anything you can do....we all find our own way and deal with the consequences. You've tried to help her...that's all you can do. Just keep living a good example in front of her and at some point, it will catch up with her and she'll have some pretty tough decisions to make. Maybe at that point, she'll listen.

[MadRebel]

I'm sure you know the ole saying: "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink!" Obviously your concern and advice is not appreciated nor listened to, so from what you've said, you've done just about all you can do with the exception of everytime you see her with those snacks just slap em outta her hand. But that's rather extreme. I would lay off for awhile and she what her response is when she sees you watching her commit suicide and not say anything for awhile. When and if she comes to you aksing for advice, then you can give her a good tongue thrashing and then start trying to help her again.

Hard love it's called.

Just my two cent's worth - for what it's worth.

Good luck

[ladytaz]

I was just gonna say what MadRebel said about the "horse". Next time she asks for your advice Cin ... just tell her, "listen, I've told you all I know of what to do, I've showed you in books what to do! Either do as I've instructed and the books have instructed, or I don't want to hear about it ANY MORE!" Shape Up or Ship Out ... or maybe Shut Up is better in this case! :wink: There just are some, that NO MATTER, will do as they please, and then ***** and complain about whatever it is! They know the solution, but they CHOOSE to wear blinders, and go on about life as they always have! Sad but true!

[clee]

I need some help here. I work with a lady who has type 2. Everyday she sits down and eats a honeybun (tons of carbs) plus she is always eating chips and pb crackers. She complains every day that her doc has told her that if she doesn't get her bgs down, she will have to go on insulin (currently no meds). She asked me "What else can I do other than what I'm doing now". Well, after hearing this on a daily basis for weeks at a time and telling her what she needs to do, I lost it this last time. I told her "If you would stop sitting there in that d@@n chair eating all those carb filled snacks, then maybe you wouldn't be having this problem, Lay off the d@@n honeybuns too".
How do you continue to deal with someone like this and still keep your cool? I've had about all I can take of telling her what she needs to do and even showing her in books and such what needs to be done, then have her just ignore my advice and continue on as she is.

Rant off !!

Could this person just be trying to get attention and sympathy for having diabetes? I think you should let her be. Some people just love to complain versus doing something about their situation. Tell her if she doesn't take care of herself, no one else IS!!! You have to take care of you and by taking on another stubborn adult who is old enough to know better is only putting more stress on you and raising not only your blood sugar but your blood pressure as well. When she starts to complain, just say "Girl!!!.. I AIN'T HEARING IT!!! :reddy:

Clee:mad:

[lewsterr]

Could this person just be trying to get attention and sympathy for having diabetes? I think you should let her be.
Could it be that this woman is killing herself because she just loves all the attention and sympathy that you’re giving her? If she adhered to your advice, you would probably stop ‘nagging’ and paying attention to her, something she doesn't want to have happen.

Instead of giving her all the attention when she’s bad, praise her when she’s good! Leave her alone, and when you see her eating something nutritious and low-carb, then shower her with the attention she thrives on. Just a thought!

[gettingby]

Could it be that this woman is killing herself because she just loves all the attention and sympathy that you’re giving her? If she adhered to your advice, you would probably stop ‘nagging’ and paying attention to her, something she doesn't want to have happen.

Instead of giving her all the attention when she’s bad, praise her when she’s good! Leave her alone, and when you see her eating something nutritious and low-carb, then shower her with the attention she thrives on. Just a thought!

I would do this Lou but I really never see her eating anything nutritious or low carb. I just get so frustrated. I really need to become the type of person who doesn't give a d@@n, then maybe things will change. I've hit the point of giving up on her.

[kgm0612]

Cin............I have an older cousin who is the exact same way. She was dx'd about 3 years ago and asked for my help back then. She wanted me to write down a list of foods that she could eat and ones she should avoid. Total waste of time because she's still eating bagels for breakfast, pasta & breads for lunch & dinner..........and tons of desserts!

Every time she sees me (4-5 times a year) she'll ask me how my blood sugars are running, tell me hers are running high, and proceed to ask me again what she should/shouldn't be eating. Her famous words are, "I can't give (bagels, pasta, bread) up".

I lost it with her last month when she asked me again for the umteenth time why her blood sugars were high and what she's doing wrong. I said, "Mary, you've asked me these questions over and over for the last 3 years. I've made suggestions, but you still refuse to listen, so I think it's time for you to ask someone else or make an appointment with a nutritionist". Sounds mean, but I just couldn't deal with her any more.

Karen

[gettingby]

Karen, thank you. I know exactly how you feel. This woman sounds exactly like your cousin.

[FrankDr]

Unless you are responsible for this person's care (obviously not the case here) - all you should ever feel obligated to do is to point them in the right direction. If they want your help, advice, friendship, etc then that's fine. Share with them as you feel compelled to.

Otherwise - We've all got enough to do keeping ourselves going the right direction. Don't wear yourself out trying to drag other people somewhere they don't want to go. I just gets everyone involved upset.

Good luck - let it go . .

[sweetcheeks]

ok, to me this is like the seatbelt law.... lol

The person that sits in that seat when they get into a car, knows that if they get into an accident, they could possibly DIE!...now that our state has forced us to wear seatbelts, it just makes me mad. this is what we hear "oh we have to save people's lives" its like this... if you choose to go without one then you choose to take the risk of dying!

if a diabetic chooses to ignore the facts and risks of eating this way constantly then they are the ones taking the risk. She obviosly doesnt care about her self or her family or she would do the right thing....and eat right and take care of herself

unless you are a child/senior citizen and cannot make your own decisions/take care of your own health then

ITS HER A$$ not yours lol

i wouldnt mess with it any longer... my mother is the same way..."i wanna lose weight, but im not giving up my pepsi" I said ok mom! then stay fat then, but dont ask me how ive lost my 50lbs that you have put on lol

[celt]

my wife was a uncooperative type two also.
so ask your friend what would that friend would like for you to say at their burial like how dumb she was or that she must have had hated everyone who cared for her to put them through this now.
or if that does not work then a fast and hard kick in the bu-- might work
or just except the fact that some will always do something dumb even it means their death.

[gettingby]

I'm so tired of playing this "game" with her. I guess it's time to stop giving her advice when she asks and keep my comments to myself. I tried, at least.