Invincibility!!

[right2fight]

I need some advice on what to do with my son who is now 13 and is going thru a period where he is IMO tempting fate. He was dx'd at 7 and has never experienced a hospitalization for diabetes epidodes. He has been educated on managing and controlling his BSL, but somehow thinks he is invincible. Many of you guys have gone thru the teen years with diabetes and I was wondering if you went thru this type of thing. I'm trying to avoid a trip to the hospital.
Margaret

[HiImDan]

It's been quite a while since my teens, but one thing that came to my mind while reading this is how many times I was told in the hospital "your only cheating yourself", when I hadn't even had a chance to prove either way. Not that I ever did "cheat myself" I just felt like saying "fine, I will"! (not accusing, just suggesting)

[right2fight]

Hi Dan, I'm not sure exactly what you're suggesting here. Can you explain, please?

[HiImDan]

Forgive me, I'm not very articulate since my stroke.

[HollyB]

This is sort of a side note, not anything that helpful, but I do think that even though I felt terrible for not getting Aaron to the hospital sooner, it's a good motivating factor for him. He was diagnosed at 13 so remembers very well how sick he was, and how quickly it happened. So far that's been enough for him to take his treatment pretty seriously.

If you sat down with your son, expressed your concern to keep him healthy and prevent long-term disaster (as opposed to blaming him for screwing up), and asked him what was keeping him from testing etc. and how you could help -- how do you think he would react? Has he started at a new school or some other situation where he might feel reluctant to "stand out?" Is he just burned out and sick of it? Does he get involved in what he's doing and forget? Remember too that at this age hormones tend to make BG erratic and you can get weird random highs for no apparent reason, which can be pretty discouraging (I've heard of kids not wanting to test cause they just hate seeing that high number come up). Testing has to be a tool to help him take action, not a report card for how "good" he is being.

Another thing to consider -- things like sleepovers with friends and other independent ventures can be conditional on diligent testing. So if he comes back from a sleepover and you don't see meter readings that show he's keeping on top of things, maybe he can't go on the next one. In general I'm not at all in favour of restricting the activities of teens with diabetes, but in this case you can explain that it's a health issue and you can't in good conscience let him out on his own for that long unless he can demonstrate that he can show good judgement while he's away.

[delvec]

I wouldnt necessarily think this is an isolated D issue. We try and make it a point that our kids are normal like everyone else. Hes a teenage boy! Hes reaching that age when we think we know everything and nothing can hurt us. BTDT- and I dont have D. D gives gives him more options.

But if youre certain it is simply D related, then it wouldnt hurt to give him a hand with it. Yes we want to burn it in our kids that THEY need to be on top of their D but we also dont wanna burn them out on it. As you said hes been very good for about 5 years- it wouldnt be the worst thing to help him out.

[Chris Graham]

I think everyone goes through this...D or no D. This posts seems timely to me because my husband, a musician, just wrote a song called "Breaking the un-breakable legg". Basically, the lyrics are about coming to terms with the fact that we aren't invincible.

I completely understand why you don't want to see him lose his good control and risk doing long-term damage to his body. Maybe there are some ways you could encourage positive, risk taking adventures. Afterall, risk is important to one's character development. Like maybe a kick-boxing class where he is really pushed physically and emotionally. Plus the exercise would be good for his numbers. Just a thought...

[Dewey]

Hi Margaret,

When I went through teen years, there were times I thought I was invincible. :( What really woke me up was that I started experiencing some effects of not keeping on top of things as much as I should (i.e. slight beginnings of background retinopathy, elevated creatinine levels & the like).

While I was never hospitalized for a radical high, I have had some severe lows....to the point of being brought to the ER on more than one occasion.

As some of the others mentioned, it may be best to have a talk with him....sitting him down & asking him about things & offering suggestions. Believe me when I say that I know it's easier said than done (I know from experience ;)). During teen years, we do tend to get that "invincibility complex," and it can indeed prove dangerous if not addressed somehow.

Here's hoping things work out in your favor and that he'll sincerely listen to your concerns. Love & hugs to you!

[right2fight]

Thank you to all for the ideas and advice. We have a wonderful relationship and speak on all topics. He knows he is screwing up, as he puts it. Adolescence is tough as acceptance is major and his interest in girls is peaking big time. A shame that D puts a damper on things and he has been socializing quite a bit lately, with movies, the fair and this weekend is the beach. I guess he's having fun and wants to put the D factor out of his mind. I have to say I don't blame him but he also knows how important it is that he manage properly. As my Mom always said, "this too shall pass" I hope without any episodes

Again thanks for being here, it helps to get other perspectives.
Margaret

[Eri's mom]

Eri's had that feeling of invincibility since she was dx'd at 6 it seems, and she is now 13. She's getting a bit better since she's been doing really good(well, until she got this ear/sinus/throat infection)...and she likes how she feels when she is in control.
Eri's stubborn, so her "phase" just happened to last somewhat long(ya think?lol)...but they do get over it!

[right2fight]

That does seem long, so glad she's in control and I hope she gets over the nasty sinus infection. We sure know what they're like.

Margaret

[right2fight]

Hi Mary Jane and thanks for the link. I have read many posts on the CWD by Ellen and have found her to be very informative and always up on the latest things, good stuff. We never let diabetes become all consuming and I wonder if he just has come to the point where he just wants it to go away. As I said he has become quite the socialite lately and maybe he's embarrassed by the whole thing. My job now is to get to the bottom of it before the dreaded endo visit. lol. Cheers, Margaret