Wanting to change.

[Marlboro]

Hello, just wanting to vent some things. Ive been having a real tough time with my diabetes. Numbers been all out of whack. Starting to ware on me, been a diabetic for about 7yrs and I'm 23 now. I think I'm starting to feel some of the side effects of the partying I've done over the past few years. Im in pretty good shape weight wise, but for the past 4 years I havent gone a week without getting trashed from booze.
BUt I have cut down a lot now. Am also a smoker, also trying to quit that because I know how much that hurts my circulation. My right arm is starting to go numb ever once in awhile and I fear my luck may be running low. Eyes feel like they're going. All I can think about is death. Sometimes I just wish I would go to sleep and not even wake up. I just feel like I'm going crazy with all this. But I'm done with all that now, I want to change.
I take humolog and lantus. Been thinking of the pump, msybe that can get me under control again?

[notme]

Hi Marlboro, welcome to Diabetes Forums.

It is never to late to start taking care of yourself and reverse some of the side effects of bad blood sugar. I was diagnosed type one in 1986 and did not get blood sugars under control until almost 1998. My vision was bad and I had some other diabetes related problems. I started on Lantus and Humalog and eventually the pump. My blood sugar has been dramatically reduced. You can reverse some of your symptoms and it seems you have already taken some of the steps needed to get healthy.

I am glad you joined and are seeking out advice and help. Welcome!!!

[Jan B]

Hi Marlboro,

Like Nancy said, it's not too late for you at all. Hey, you realize what you are doing, so now you can take positive steps.

The pump might kick you into better control, but I think that first, you should go back to the basics and learn to use your lantus and humalog correctly. Get your carb to insulin ratio correct, and start putting things into your body that you would feed your best friend. You are already admitting you need help -- this forum can help, so take advantage of it. When you get to the point you are ready for a pump, that will be another "present" you can give yourself.


Welcome

[xMenace]

Pumping can definately help, but forums like this can help even more. Keep coming. Keep chatting. You are not unique nor alone. Think baby steps. You can't change your life in one fell swoop.

BTW you can't tell by symptoms whether your eyes are deteriorating. You need a dialated exam. The symptoms you'd experience leave little to no doubt that someting bad happenned.

[TenderVittleS]

Pumping is not the "cure all" answer. A pump is not going to make you stop smoking or drinking. You can control whatever you need to, there's no special cure for anything. You're just trying to take a so called easy way out. You're gonna smell the roses soon when you feel like **** everyday and ditch your friends who just make things worse. You can only blame yourself. Eat right and watch yourself, its very simple.

[shabbie]

hi marlboro,
as the others already said you need to start back to basics again with caring for yourself again. the pump isnt a quick fix, if you cant be bothered with your shots then chances are you wont be bothered about pumping either, it takes more work than people think.
your teenage years are over now and its time you started to learn to love yourself again.

this is a great forum with lots of love and support, come often, ask plenty and share lots.

welcome to your new life!

[ant hill]

Hello Malboro and welcome to our happy family who will help you with your diabetes. I can say that the people here are a great bunch that you can laugh, Cry, And hope fore a cure *cohoff* and some tough decisions to make as we will be there for you so have a look at the threads that we have here and become a step ahead of your current doctor. :D

[Gordonm]

Pumping is not the "cure all" answer. A pump is not going to make you stop smoking or drinking. You can control whatever you need to, there's no special cure for anything. You're just trying to take a so called easy way out. You're gonna smell the roses soon when you feel like **** everyday and ditch your friends who just make things worse. You can only blame yourself. Eat right and watch yourself, its very simple.

Perfect answer.

You have to take control. The pump is not going to do it for you. It is hard work that goes on 24 hrs a day. It never stops. Until you realize this you are only fooling yourself. Take charge of your life and move on. Get out of the bottle and quit smoking. Get another "hobby" and start doing things right for yourself. If not you will start feeling the effects of it very soon and will lead to poor control.

[Evermont]

...I want to change....
Welcome!

Wanting to change is a good first step but only if it leads to steps that actually make a difference. I hope you make it and I wouldn't mind helping if I can, but I'm not real excited about trying to talk someone who self identifies as "Marlboro" out of a nicotine addiction.

How silly might you feel years from now, after all your new friends here help you turn things around, and maybe you quit smoking, yet your user name is "Marlboro" ? Maybe start over with a new moniker, just a thought. Maybe "WiserBud" or something.

[silverfrost]

Hello and welcome to the forums. I'm proud of you for wanting to change your lifestyle. I know that changing habits can be extremely difficult, but you will certainly find help here. I know I did! Good luck with everything, and I hope I can help. :)

[Gary_W]

I've had T1 diabetes since around '96. I came to this board almost a year ago now due to feeling dreadful most of the time.

A year on, my life is back and I feel fantastic. Life is very much worth living.

This place is excellent for education and support. Education and support are only as useful as you make them, so I wish you luck. You are 23 and have the potential to make an excellent life for yourself. Ditch the cigarettes, go easy on the beer. Life can be wonderful without either. Calm down and start to enjoy it. Do not let a condition that life has thrown at you beat you down; it takes effort to live with it, but (done right) its impact can be minimal and comes down to a few mins management a day. Take the management skills you learn doing this and do something else positive (improve a relationship or your career). After all, if you can control diabetes and feel good with this thing in the background, you can do anything.

Once again, good luck and welcome to the board.

Gary