Friend With Pre D

[gettingby]

I have a friend who's doctor just diagnosed her as being pre D. She is having an awful time trying to deal with the pre D and the fact that she has a severe wheat allergy. She's wondering how to work both diets into her life. Any advice I can give her? So far I've told her to watch her carb intake and to maybe get her a monitor to keep a check on her bgs. So far, she's done none of this and I'm worried for her.

Thanks.

[xMenace]

Why are these diets conflicting? Just don't eat wheat.

[Larry H.]

There are those who for what ever reason live in denial of the problem and proceed as usual. Until something severe happens they don't seem to have the motivation to change. Not much you can do about that if the person is unwilling. But they should be made aware of the possible problems that can occur if prevention is not implemented in time.

[Subby]

Sounding fair and square like a form of denial, I agree that sometimes being told the problems that could occur might be one way to go - but I alsio think that denial usually comes from fear, and the grim or shock tactic direction might actually make the denial more entrenched. Just a thought, you're going to need to decide as you know this person.

Perhaps not feeling alone and that it's so grim, could help. Maybe you could fight this sense of hopelessness, with some practicality. You could sit down with her and write up a list of foods she eats with wheat in it. Then for at least some of them, write a substitute next to it. If carby suggest portions, it does sound like steps might be the ways to go. You might be able to come up with some on the spot. I bet the internet and this forum could help out with ideas.

Make the list a big type and very readable, and encourage that she puts it on the fridge. You could even go shopping for some of the substitutes, too. Or if she is willing, help clear out the cupboard.


Here's some more thought about what might be going on:

Before diabetes or a similar condition occurs, many people have only ever taken a non-proactive, non-practical approach to their health. They take ABs, but it doesn't really matter if they finish the whole course, they get better anyway. They can ignore headaches, aches and pains, they generally go away. Being sick is pretty rare and is something to be "suffered" though and resented, rather than nurturing your body. We are used to thinking that maybe our actions didn't really have much to do with the cure, maybe what we do is largely ineffective. Etc etc. And even if people do suffer from various illnesses, they often either go away in the end or don't need the attention to life detail diabetes does. The prospect of diabetes is a different thing to consider.

I would say a problem might be, she may just not have any experience integrating a major health consideration in a practical, positive, persistent, reasonable way. Maybe you can really help her learn a good sensible approach, here.

[davef]

Cin,

Gretchen Becker who wrote "The First year: Type 2 Diabetes" (which I found to be a great book) has released a new booked for Pre-D's, it might be worth suggesting she get and buy the book.

I have a good friend who has been diagnosed with syndrome-X (Pre-d), the first couple of days after dx he was somewhat shocked, and seemed ready to make changes - it didn't last :( He quickly went back to his old ways, lots of carbs and sweet things. I watched him eat two large bowls of Ben & Jerry's chocolate something something Ice cream the other night. His BP is sky high, he has a family history of cardiac issues, get gout etc, etc.

I will continue to support him, but I have had to accept that I can't take responsibility for his health - only he can do that. He has told me that himself and his wife are starting a new health regime in Sept, I'll row in behind him and get him exercising and do anything else I can but really he needs to make this decision for himself. The same will be true for your friend, I would be pretty sure that if either of us were to nag our friends that it (A) wouldn't work and (B) could lose our friends as they would not want to spend time with somebody who nags them.

Perhaps have a coffee with your friend, tell her that you will not be nagging her, that you know getting a DX can be overwhelming and that denial is normal. Suggest the book, occassional testing, diet/lifestyle changes and let her know that you won't mention it again but when she is ready to do something to let you know and you will be there for her. Explain you are worried about her, the chances of full blown D and the associated risks, but that she needs to make this decision for herself. Then give her some space, maybe in a month or two if she has not made any changes you could simply say "You know I'm here for you if you want to take control of your Pre-D" and then leave it at that.

It's not easy seeing a friend like this, but in reality all we can do is to be there when they are ready.

Happy Friday,

[genie86333]

The two diets won't conflict - in fact, already avoiding wheat has put her a step ahead with the diabetic lifestyle. Now she just has to watch other carbs as well.

If she's not doing that despite what you told her, it's because she doesn't want to & ultimately, that's her responsibility. You've given her the info she needs. Hopefully, she'll do something with it before she develops complications.

[Ronin]

Hi Cin!

What your friend needs to understand is that the Pre-D Diagnosis is being handed out as a warning measure. Simply put, address it now, change your life-style and live outside the world of full blown diabetes or at least delay it for a very long time.

The wheat allergy should be getting your friend away from one source of carbs, but perhaps driving towards other sources which are even more loaded than wheat.

I also recommend that your friend read "Know Your Numbers: outlive your diabetes" as it addresses the most common source of the Pre-D diagnosis -- The Metabolic Syndrome which often brings along other symptoms like wheat allergies.