New to forum...Worried about my father.

[thecongo]

Hello,

I'm Kevin, 24, from Long Island NY. I joined this forum in hope that I could some how vent about my current situation with my diabetic father.
He was diagnosed in '91 with Type 2. And over the past 18 years RARELY took care of his glucose levels. It would be safe to say that his meter on avergae registered over 400. I remember clearly as a young boy seeing his meter read close to 600. Never staying on top of his meds, having a daily high-carb intake, and being a steady weekend drinker finally all caught up to him at the beginning of the year. Both of his eyes started hemmorhaging. He went from driving and working on computers to sitting on the couch all day, with that "blind stare". Hes anemic, emaciated, depressed, paranoid and just in an overall funk. He barely eats because he always has to throw up(which makes the bleeding worse). Also, his kidneys are only working at 40%.
In regards to his eyes, hes been seeing a vitreal specialist whom I get the impression only wants to do laser. Everytime my father asks him about other options he says everything else is 'too risky'. Its like this doc is giving him up for dead. He told him to start preparing himself because his vision will only get worse and that eventually itll be barely good enough to walk around the house. And in all honesty, I think this DRs bummed attitude has something to do with my fathers crappy insurance (HIP).

What is the success rate with a vitrectomy? should we look for another DR?

I hope you guys can help me some. I hate seeing my dad like this. I put on a straight face most of the time, but deep down this whole thing is crushing me. I remember being 10 years old and writing to the ADA requesting info on diabetes. He never paid much attention to my efforts, however I hold nothing of his past against him...Im here to help him any way I possibly can.

Thanks everyone...

Kevin

[princesslinda]

Hi Kevin, welcome to the forums. I'm so very sorry your dad and your family are having to go through all of this. It's a very familiar story to me, as I went through the same thing (along with amputations and kidney failure with my mom, who died at age 54).

I can't offer you any advice on his eyes, but there are many here who have had experience with this and i'm sure they'll chime in at some point.

Because of your family history, I encourage you to keep yourself at a healthy weight, have an annual physical and a hemaglobin A1C (test that measures your 90 day average blood sugar). After watching my mom deal so badly with her diabetes, I should have been much more diligent in keeping my weight down and having regular diabetic screenings....but I didn't, and here I am diagnosed at 42 with T2 diabetes.

I will assure you that everyone doesn't walk the same path as your dad and my mom did. Many here have been dealing with diabetes for many years w/o much in the way of complications.

Thank you for sharing your dad's story. I'm sure it will provide motivation to many of us, as no one should have to go through what your dad has.

[genie86333]

Hi, Kevin. Welcome to the forum.

You say the doctor "wants to do laser" - why is that a problem? Yes, a vitrectomy *may* help temporarily, but the laser is the most important 1st step to (at least temporarily) stop the bleeding. Many find that once that's been done (at least until there's another bleed) the vision clears significantly, if not totally. (Mine cleared totally, my vision is back to normal.)

And yes, a vitrectomy is more risky in general, and not knowing exactly what his doctor knows...there may be factors that make it even more risky for your father.

What is your father doing now to treat the diabetes? Is he using insulin, oral meds, diet (I know you said he doesn't eat much, but does he eat right when he does eat?)

[minkydog]

Hello,

I'm Kevin, 24, from Long Island NY. I joined this forum in hope that I could some how vent about my current situation with my diabetic father.
He was diagnosed in '91 with Type 2. And over the past 18 years RARELY took care of his glucose levels. It would be safe to say that his meter on avergae registered over 400. I hope you guys can help me some. I hate seeing my dad like this. I put on a straight face most of the time, but deep down this whole thing is crushing me. I remember being 10 years old and writing to the ADA requesting info on diabetes. He never paid much attention to my efforts, however I hold nothing of his past against him...Im here to help him any way I possibly can.

Thanks everyone...

Kevin

I'm so sorry your dad is going through this. i think under the circumstances it's not unusual for him to be depressed. Is he getting any treatment for that? People who have serious chronic illness of any kind are way more likely to develop depression, especially if they are over 60. It's really hard to care about yourself when you're so depressed. And he's probably very mad at himself, and a little guilty, knowing that he caused a lot of his problems.

I feel for you too. It's so hard to watch your parent basically take the path of self-destruction. That's what my mother is doing. She is so mad that she's got diabetes that she refuses to test most of the time. Says if she doesn't test, then she doesn't have to know she's diabetic. :whistling Here's the thing: she's an RN. She knows better. She hounded my dad CONSTANTLY as long as he lived, to test, to improve his diet, to exercise. And yet she has chosen not to exercise or test or manage her diet. She's of sound minde, so there's no doing anything about it. So far, both her feet have gone numb and her A1c is about 9.1. :eek Mother knows what she's doing. She just doesn't care.