How (and why) did you tell your kids?

[zookeeper671]

I'm "like a mommy" (as he says) to my bf's 8 year old son, who does not know I have diabetes. He knows I check my bgl, but he doesn't know why. I would like to explain it to him, but my bf has said to keep it hush-hush. The little-one and I spend a lot of time together, swimming, playing, etc. while my bf is at work. Sunday, while at church, I began going hypo and new I had to get something to eat. I told the little-one that I needed to eat, that we had to leave (was going to go to the nearest 7-11 to grab a sandwich) and he began the questioning/whining. "Why can't we stay? I don't want to go!" The only reply I had was "I need to get something to eat. I'm really, really hungry."

I'm just wondering if I should open up to the little-one or not. If I do, I'm wondering how those of you with kids explained it to your little-ones. How you explained hypos, what to do if there's something wrong, etc.

Big part of me thinks I should follow my bf's path and keep this a secret. I want the little-one to feel secure when he's with me. But a smaller part of me thinks he should at least know to call 911 if I stupidly allow myself to go severely hypo when I'm watching him.

I do believe I'm rambling... but you get the gist. What would you do if you were in my position? And if you were... you'd be orange, thanks to a sunless tanning disaster.

[archimeech]

I have a 7 yr old Daughter and a 2 yr old Son. They both know as much as their own level of understanding allows. IT IS IMPERATIVE THAT YOUR FAMILY KNOW YOU HAVE DIABETES AND WHAT TO DO TO HELP.
It's simply wrong for your boyfriend to "hide" this from his son. I don't know what his reasons are, but there is no excuse. If you are to be in both their lives and especially if you're going to be the only adult in charge of his son for any period of time; the boy needs to know and understand what is going on...

I explained it to my daughter at an early age, in that Daddy has a problem with his sugar and sometimes doesn't feel good. When he's feeling bad, he needs to eat something or have a sweet or a juice. She understands it, and if I mention I'm not feeling good and my sugar is low, she even helps or at least quiets down so I can tend to my need. He's 8 and may be ignorant of things due to age, but I'm sure he's not stupid! Information will keep everyone safe!

I'm sorry honey, but I can't even begin to understand why this guy is doing this. Is he ashamed of your problem? If so, I think you should rethink the whole situation. You're life will depend on it at some point.

[Jamie]

I agree with Meech. Kids need to know. You will be surprised how much they can understand, learn what your needs will be, and how to provide whatever help they can.

[jeggeman31]

I have a 7 yr old Daughter and a 2 yr old Son. They both know as much as their own level of understanding allows. IT IS IMPERATIVE THAT YOUR FAMILY KNOW YOU HAVE DIABETES AND WHAT TO DO TO HELP.

I have an 11yo, 9yo and 5yo and they all know as meech said to their own level of understanding allows. They keep me inline, and they all know how to use my Glucagon Emergency kit if I should ever need it.

[Clint]

my 6yr old and 3yr old both know. My 6yr old has helped me when I needed it. Everyone around you needs to know incase you have a problem and need help.

I say, tell'em :)

[liz32]

I agree with everyone..it's imperitive that this little one understand. It won't be traumatic if you explain it in simple honest and strait forward words. At first I explained it that I was allergic to sugar...they understood what being allergic means (my son's allergic to cats). As their understanding grew, I explained more. Now my son asks what my bs is and if I say 6.8, he'll say "you want a five mommy". He even explains it to his little friends (he's 4). One of them offered me bubble gum and he told them that I was diabetic and couldn't eat it. I thaught it was quite cute, but then again I'm his mom! :) Kids are great and like others said, he could be a help if you do go hypo. I'd have another talk with your bf and ask him to rethink his position. take care

[twocute64001]

My daughter grew up with me checking my BG and taking insulin, to her it was just a part of who mommy was. She knew and understood that mommy did not eat certain foods but it was OK for Heather to eat them. She understood that mommy needed a nap so she never argued about taking a nap. (gave me time for paying bills, hot bath ect...)

As Heather got grew, I answered her questions as honestly as possible, making sure she truly understood. (I am sure that at times it went way over her head) She knew her chances of getting diabetes were no higher than any other kid. (she asked that question at about 4 years old) She also understood my carb to insulin ratio by the time she was 9 or 10, and would look at my book every now and then and out of curiosity ask questions or make comments - (mom you didn't write down what you ate last tuesday, or mom you took 20 units for ice cream?)

When she was 15 we had an emergency situation where I passed out and she knew exactly how to handle it. She checked my blood, called 911 and found the glucogun and mixed and used it. By the time the paramedics arrived things were at least more under control than if she had not known what to do.

My daughter is now 24, If your son grows up with openess about your condition, he will never be afraid of it.

[christie]

my kids are 6 and 2, i too have explained as much as i can to what they can understand, they have seen me take my insulin and check my sugars with fingers and also on my arms, they have seen me have hypo's. to them it is a way of life for mommy to be this way. i really don't think my son who's 6 totally understands which with his age is to be expected at times when he has candy he'll try to share with me but when my sugars are high i tell him i can't eat candy and he gets disappointed. he has said before mommy check your sugars you look like you are getting low. and my daughter who's 2 had a stick like thing the other day and she was trying to give me a shot with it. diabetes is nothing to be ashamed of .lord knows we did'nt ask for it,or do something bad to get it.

[PepsiLvr]

I agree with everyone too. I would ask him why he wants you to keep it a secret. I don't think it will make his son think any less of you. Could it be that your BF has a problem with your diabets? Everyone is different. Diabetes is just as much a part of your life as your BF and his son are a part of your life. I would almost go as far as saying that it's not fair for him to be kept in the dark about it. I know that when my GF's son who is 3 now asks about my diabetes his mother and myself will let him know all he wants. Good luck to you.

[rzrbks]

Joining the chorus here

I would wonder why you're supposed to keep it a secret?

Ex- would use it against him, perhaps?

Something like this, that effects both your lifeand the son's life should be where the boy understands why you have to do the things you do, besides, what if you get to the point where you need help someday?

[am1977]

I don't have kids, but, if I did, I don't think I would hide my diabetes from them. I don't see any reason to. Like most have said, if you explain things in simple terms, kids will understand and learn. Actually, it's probably a good thing for kids to know what is going on, especially in an emergency situation (god forbid). A child is very capable of helping or even saving somebody's life as I'm sure we have all heard in the news.

[Belinda]

I don't have kids either but those I teach and are around often (babysitting) know and even though the ones I teach are special ed...they know exactly what to do if I go hypo...you need to tell him...he may find you passed out one day and just assume your asleep....

[Cielo]

Angie have you spoken to your bf? Hopefully he reconsiders. Diabetes is just a part of who you are and you should be open and free with that, ESPECIALLY with those closest to you. It is critical that his son know that you have a condition which may require emergency treatment, it is crucial that he is aware of this. He is 8 years old, and tho he is still young, he is more than able at this age to grasp diabetes and he will feel no differently about you. I really hope you speak with your bf....I wouldn't recommend telling his son without first consulting your bf tho...yall should call a family meeting.

[jdstein11]

I've only been dxd for a week now, but we told our sons (7 and 5) right away what to expect, that Daddy's body isn't making insulin so it can process the sugar in my blood, so they will see me using a machine to check my blood sugar and if the machine tells me I have too much, I'll use an injector pen to give my body the insulin it needs. I showed them all the stuff and made sure they knew that they were never to touch it or look at it without myself or my wife there to handle it.

We don't believe in keeping secrets from our kids, nor do we want them curious as to why I have to sneak off every 4 hours or so. Now they're involved in my treatment and feel more relieved at knowing that everything is ok, that I'm not seriously ill. I can't imagine not telling them. Kids understand that when you're sick, you see a doctor and take medicine. Kids also know about shots and needles, so if you explain to them what is going on with your body and how you need to treat it to feel normal, they'll understand and may even become enthusiastic about helping you with your treatment, at least to the extent possible.

As for my 7 year-old, he already asked if he will get diabetes, and I explained to him that there are no guarantees, but that the chances are very low and that this isn't something he should worry about.

Your situation sounds like you need to discuss with your bf the importance of information to kids so they feel secure in their environment, and they know what's going on. No one likes to feel as if they're in the dark, especially children who often have no say in what goes on inside their own household.

Good luck!

Regards,

Justin

[zookeeper671]

First off, I want to thank everyone for your honest and kind replies. It really helps to know how you all feel about this issue, and that my view about it isn't skewed.

...I would wonder why you're supposed to keep it a secret? Ex- would use it against him, perhaps?...

You nailed it, rzr. He doesn't want his ex to know. I don't see why it should be an issue, though. She has a Vicodin "habit", which I think is worse than my having diabetes.

To be honest, when my bf said to keep it a secret, it kinda hurt. I still haven't told the munchkin. He does know a little about diabetes because one of his day care babysitters has it. When we were discussing how I prefer not to eat sweets, he mentioned how his babysitter has diabetes and doesn't eat any sweets, either. (That's all he knows about it... "can't eat sugar.") It was just killing me, sitting there, not saying a word.

Now if only I can get passed the nervousness of bringing up this topic again with my bf. If he says "I don't want him to know" again, I might try to have him read your replies. Maybe that will change his view?

[archimeech]

Honey, don't be nervous about anything. This is your life, we're talking about. Simply put:

-If he loves you, you need to come to an agreement that YOU can live with. Our suggestion still stands; everyone should know.

-if he's worried about what the Ex will think, talk to a lawyer about the situation. I'm sure that he AND the divorce court Judge will not have a problem with a Diabetic in this boys life. Sure beats a drug addict, irregardless of wether or not it's a prescription.

-It's safer for all involved if the boy knows. It would be much worse if you continue to hide it, and something were to happen to the 2 of you because the boy didn't know.

Most Importantly: Lay down the law. If he wants to be with you, then he needs to allow you to teach his son about diabetes. For God's sake, it's not leprosy! ...and as I've said on previous posts with other women......

......You want us guys to have a chat with him? We can set him straight. :D

[duck]

Hey, tell your hunny I'm glad he's letting his ex still influence his life.

[gettingby]

Angie,
I'm always late replying to things like this cause I like to get my words and thoughts together. That way I don't ramble or appear to be an "airhead" (lol).
First off, I really think your b/f should reconsider his decision. Heaven forbid something should happen while you are alone with this young man. Kids are resilient (sp), they actually know more nowadays than we think they do.
My daughter will be 15 in 2 months. She has known to call Mamaw or 911 since she was 4 yrs old. She knows exactly how to use my monitor and she knows what too low is. Heck, she's known all of this since she was 6 or 7.
I'm sure that this young man will be able to handle this news.
Also, if he knows that his babysitter has diabetes, what would be the difference in him knowing that you do too?? Maybe he could learn some things that would allow him to help you and the babysitter should the need arise.
Let the b/f read these replies. If this was a poll, my answer would be to let him know. You and the b/f both need to sit down and discuss this with him. Sorry it's so long but I had alot to say. :D

[gettingby]

......You want us guys to have a chat with him? We can set him straight. :D
Hey, can we females be involved in this?? I'm feeling a little onery today. :D

[archimeech]

Sure Cin'
grab your sneakers and the vaseline. it's time to rumble!!!

j/k, but in all seriousness. You need to address this issue, Angie.

[gettingby]

Sure Cin'
grab your sneakers and the vaseline. it's time to rumble!!!

j/k, but in all seriousness. You need to address this issue, Angie.
Let's go !!!!!!!!! LOL.
I'm just sitting here waiting to hear from Dew about Carwy and the waiting is killing me. :(

[Cielo]

If it were me...I'd lay down like this for the bf: Either you reconsider the decision to tell your son or I will reconsider us. Honestly, why live a lie. If yall are in this for the long haul, his son will get older and wiser. He is not blind or deaf....he is very aware and alert, moreso than most adults. He will ONE DAY learn that you have diabetes, why wait? Especially if it'd be safer for you AND and boy to address it now. This issue kinda makes me mad. Is he ashamed of you having diabetes? Why does he care what his ex thinks?? What, is she afraid it's contagious and putting her son in danger? Please keep us posted and good luck! Putting it out there is what's right for you AND the boy.

[Dewey]

Let's go !!!!!!!!! LOL.
I'm just sitting here waiting to hear from Dew about Carwy and the waiting is killing me. :(
Hey, we're back on the scene...lol Had to do some travelling to get Carwy better :D, but it's worth every mile! :D Meanwhile, I'm with everyone else when they say you should lay down the law about your Diabetes to your boyfriend (and teaching his son should any needs arose). While each of us has had different situations, it's good to hear them all, as they may be helpful. I've been babysitting since I was 14 or 15, and at the time, the little girl I watched (Samantha) was about 2 and a half or 3. Even She knew when something wasn't right, and knew that I had to eat if I was acting strangely. Like Cin said, children are not only resilient, but they are far more aware of things than they're given credit for. It's imperative that your boyfriend's son knows "what's up" in case something, like what happened to you in church, happens again. I apologize if I sound like a mother hen, but your boyfriend's suggestion to withhold information is not wise. It could end up causing a severe situation, rather than keeping things safely hidden and tucked away. Just some thoughts here.....Hope everything turns out better, Ang. We're all here and on your side! :)

[Erin]

Your boyfriend's son is going to figure it out (if he hasn't already) and he is going to be confused and upset that you tried to hide it from him. He will think that diabetes is something shameful because you and his dad didn't tell him about it. He already knows the basics, because his babysitter has D, and it's only a matter of time before he puts 2 and 2 together and gets 4.

It'll be better for him, and you, and his dad ultimately if you tell him now. I am, however, concerned that your bf has some weird issues with it. I've dated guys who didn't want me to tell their kids, and it usually boiled down to either A) they didn't think I was going to be around long, and so just didn't want to deal with explaining it to their kid. Or B) they had some issues with me having diabetes. If it's a custody issue, you just need to talk to the lawyers, there's no reason it would be a problem.

[Belinda]

As for babysitting kids and letting them know...I do it all the time. I figure it is best for us all.

Just this past week I was in Atlanta visiting my college roomie and family. Her son 6 and daughter 3 know all about it. She,daughter, helped me push the blue button on my meter. Also recently at the doctors office the doctor came in with a pump and the kids said...."You are diabetic just like Aunt BB. She wears one of those too (pump). The doctor was impressed

[zookeeper671]

Thanks, all, for the support on this. I made a weak attempt to bring up the diabetes topic while bf and munchkin were in the same room together, and my bf kind of made a "not now" face (such as http://www.planetsmilies.com/smilies/mad/mad0253.gif). What's neat is that the little-one actually wants to have his blood sugar tested whenever I test mine. He thinks it's "cool." http://www.planetsmilies.com/smilies/happy/happy0203.gif

Just typing this is getting me a bit ruffled. I just don't see why my having diabetes should be kept a secret. Unless it's true that he's ashamed of it? I don't see him as thinking that way, though. :confused: I'm going to talk with my bf as soon as I post this. Will let you know how it goes.

[jdstein11]

Best of luck, Angie. Be strong in making your case because you should know you're right.

[archimeech]

Angie, tell us. How did it go?.......

[zookeeper671]

Typing to you all from Arkansas, where we're all visiting my bf's family.

As for how it went,... it went. I told the munchkin I have diabetes without discussing it any further with my bf. The little one's response was, "what's diabetes?" During the road trip, while all in the car together, I asked my bf, "Just how do you go about explaining diabetes to a child?" He shrugged his shoulders.

About 20 min. ago I brought the topic up again. He (bf) said that he feels "there's no reason to worry" the munchkin about such things. :argh:

So I guess this is how it's going to be. The kid knows I have it, but he doesn't know what "it" is. He knows I watch what I eat and have to test my bgl, and when I test, he wants to be tested, also. He even asks to be tested when it's not time for me to test. :) He scratched a mosquito bite until it bled, then said "It's bleeding... Hey! We can test my blood sugar with this!" lol

Basically, whenever the chance to discuss diabetes arises these days, I take it. I'll teach the little-one, little by little, that there's no need to be afraid of it. Would be great if I had a little help in the task, but it's ok. :)

[archimeech]

I'll teach the little-one, little by little, that there's no need to be afraid of it. Would be great if I had a little help in the task, but it's ok. :)

Honey, I don't really think it's OK. Are you settling for this guy, or losing your own identity? Or are you fine with him completely pushing aside the fact that you have a serious disease that requires education of all involved?

I don't know if I'm making too much of this, but it doesn't sound good to me. :(

[CarlyesHope]

Honey, I don't really think it's OK. Are you settling for this guy, or losing your own identity? Or are you fine with him completely pushing aside the fact that you have a serious disease that requires education of all involved?

I don't know if I'm making too much of this, but it doesn't sound good to me. :(

I agree, I agree, I agree!!

Your b/f is basically ignoring the fact that you have diabetes, so tell me this, where will he be in an emergency? Where will he be when your A1c numbers are high and your depressed? Where will he be when your craving choc. cake and should be talked out of it? Where will he be 20 years from now when your body is weak and requires extra care? I suspect, he won't be there for you then, when/if there is problems if he can't be there for you now when there are none.

I'm sorry, but if I were you, I would be thinking about getting myself a new boyfriend, one who accepts me for who I am.

[mg_2204]

About kids and telling them: Kids by nature are so curious and open minded. They are like little sponges! They want to know everything. And since knowledge is power... Never forget that. :) When I was a child (when dinosaurs roamed) I knew nothing. In those days, you told nothing to your children. By teaching your children about all kinds of things not only do you empower them... but you make them feel like valued and important members of the family. That's the way it should be.

About some people's attitude towards diabetes and diabetics: I have a husband who still thinks one day I'll get over diabetes. I have diabetes but just a mild case of it. I am rather accepting of the disease now. That's probably why I can stay focussed on my goals now. Is he a less caring and loving man because he just can't face the fact I am diabetic and will remain so until my last breath? He is probably more afraid than I am in fact. Would I suffer from MS instead of diabetes, he wouuld have the same attitude. When my mother was dying of cancer, he felt more powerless than I did I think. He's the kind of guy that loves smooth sailing but hardly copes in rough seas. I'm the opposite. We make a great team. But yes it is tirering to always be the strong one. You need to ask yourself 'Is this what I want?'.

The very best to you!

[Lee73]

Hi Angie,

I am with the chorus.

It seems to me that your b/f is not so much concerned with how your diabetes will affect his son or his ex etc (as you have written, his son has dealt with it fine so far and his ex seems to have problems all her own). These seem simply like convenient excuses that allow HIM to cop out from dealing with your diabetes. I understand that different people react to diabetes, well...differently but the way that HE reacts to you having diabetes is very important. You deserve support. You deserve an environment where you feel safe and where you can be honest. There is nothing shameful about diabetes and by trying to avoid it or hide it, it WILL seem more frightening (to those being deceived) and it WILL be dangerous (to your health).

I wish you the best of luck with this situation. It will be a tricky conversation to have with your b/f, but just remember that you are worth it and you deserve the best.

Lee

[jdstein11]

Wow, there seems to be a lot of discussion here, which is good. Angie, the way I told my kids was simply to explain that everyone has sugar in their blood, and that everyone has a way that their body makes sure that their sugar level is right for their body. My body, for some reason that I don't understand, stopped making the insulin that helps control my sugar level. That's why I take shots to put the right amount (hopefully!) of insulin into my body so I can help it maintain the right level of sugar.

My wife and I thought that this was a reasonable way to explain to them what diabetes is and how insulin comes into play. Now they're annoying me constantly to ask me when I'm testing and taking a shot so they can watch! It's better than them being scared, and they now feel involved and comfortable with what I'm going through.

I hope that helps...

Justin

[am1977]

Angie, :smile:

I think the decision to tell the child or not is really up to you...not your b/f. Afterall it is your health and your business and you should be the one deciding who it is you feel comfortable telling.

I don't really understand why it has to be kept hidden...having diabetes isn't such a scary or taboo thing. So many people have it nowadays...it's quite commone (ok, type 2, but still)and a lot are doing just fine, so I don't think it's grounds for calling someone unfit to raise a child.

In a way it surprises me that your b/f doesn't want his son to know. Wouldn't he feel better to know that his son knows what to do during a hypoglycemic episode if he (your b/f) isn't around? I would think that would be a comfort to him knowing that if something should happen, the little boy would know how to help you.

Yes, this definitely is an interesting topic, but I know it's a little controversial too and deciding what to do isn't easy. I wish you luck with everything and hope you resolve this soon. :shakehand

[Dewey]

I agree with the other's thoughts. I'm sorry that he's avoiding this chat, and do not like that he seems to sweep it under the rug every time the subject is brought up. :( I sure hope that you can find a good, feasible solution to all this. Best wishes, and please keep us posted. :shakehand

[Erin]

Does your b/f avoid the diabetes altogether or just when it relates to his son? Cause if it's just about his kid, then it's one thing. If he can't talk about it / deal with it at all, that's quite another...

I hope everything works out, keep us updated.

[zookeeper671]

It's become evident to me that my bf doesn't care to discuss the topic of diabetes. I think he's afraid of the topic, actually. Because of that, I believe he doesn't want any discussion of it in front of his little-one.

I tried to bring up the topic about 30 min. ago, and he pretty much ignored me. I'm not sure what to think. :dong: I know he loves me (has been talking about marriage, lately), but he tends to dodge issues out of (what I think is) pure disinterest (or dislike?).

He was supportive when I was first diagnosed. I felt safe when I was with him (and still do!). But the topic of diabetes has become taboo. At this point, I'm tired of trying to discuss it with him. However, whenever I test my bgl in front of the little-one, and he asks "why?", I'm going to tell him. I'm still nervous as to how to tell the little-one what do in case I become goofy (and in need of help) due to low blood sugar. I'd rather have his daddy (bf) discuss this with him... actually feel he should be the one to tell him... but I guess not now.

I'll just enjoy my time in Arkansas, and work little by little on educating the little-one about why I test my bgl. And when I feel the time is right, I'll make yet another attempt at discussing the issue with my bf.

Just wish I knew why he doesn't want to talk about it? :confused:

Thanks so much for the support. :smile: Eventually I've got to get this all straightened out.

[Cielo]

Hi Angie,

What's the latest with this? I'm glad you talked to the little man about your diabetes. Did your bf have a fit over that? Have you asked your bf pointblank what his deal is and why he is seemingly incapable of discussing your diabetes and your HEALTH? If you haven't, I strongly urge you to have this discussion with him. I know it's a hard thing to think about, but if he can't accept you for who you are and if he can't embrace you as a WHOLE, diabetes included, then do you really want to spend your life with him (and does he even deserve that? IMO, No he does not). If he is scared off by your diabetes what is going to happen down the road when other obstacles and illnesses (hopefully none will arise) pop up out of the blue?

Please keep us posted and we're all here for you.

Diana

[rzrbks]

Send that Boy's E-mail address to me and I'll talk to him, one Razorback TO ANOTHER.

He needs to be strong in his support of you and what you're going through---


MVHO.

[debaroo]

i agree with everyone on here why keep it a secrete? its a big part of your life and like most have said kids are curious and want to understand and they will..my best friends kids who i love and adore are always interested aunt debbie whats your blood sugar do you need something to eat can we watch you take your blood test...and this has helped when they go to the doc and get needles there not afraid anymore...i say tell the little boy...just a suggestion

[zookeeper671]

Back from Arkansas. Had a really good visit. "Grandpa" bought a bunch of "diabetic" chocolate for me while I was there... of which the kid ate most of in one morning (while we were all asleep) and soon developed a nasty tummy ache. Maltitol. :toilet:

I've talked a great deal about diabetes to the munchkin, and he continues to ask questions about it...

"You have a little red dot on your skin. Is that because you have diabetes?"
"Why don't you drink regular soda? Don't you like it? Is it because you have diabetes?"
(As I'm testing...) "Can you test me?! What's my blood sugar?!"

I've also explained that sometimes my bsl goes too low, and when it goes too low I need to eat something right away. Still wondering how to ease in the "if I'm babbling, fall on my face, or won't wake up" topic. :confused:

My bf doesn't want to discuss the topic with his son for fear "of frightening him". So, I've taken over, and talk about diabetes and what it's about to the little-one a bit more almost every day.

My bf also doesn't really want to discuss the topic with me, either, because "he worries about me". :frown: It upsets him to talk about it. However, I know he'd be there for me in a crisis, no doubt.

I feel this entire issue of telling the kid could have been done in about 20 min. with the help of my bf. Since I've had to do it alone, I'm basically stumbling my way through it. I feel responsible enough to try to make sure a diabetic crisis doesn't evolve, so the kid won't have to worry about it, but perfection doesn't exist with this disease.

[gettingby]

Angie,
The last sentence of your last post says it all. PERFECTION IS NOT POSSIBLE !!!!!! No matter how hard we try, something is eventually going to happen.
I was diagnosed in my teens. My best friend at the time had a younger brother. He always wanted to know what was going on. He was always asking if I was ok (got annoying at times but I loved him for it).
I know my offer still stands to come there for a good old fashioned butt whipping. Hopefully, Meech will "have my back". LOL :elefant:

[Cookie]

Angie,

I hope things continue to get better - I'm glad you've taken things into your own hands and have decided to tell the little one, children are so interested in things and the earlier he knows all about diabetes, the more 'cool' he'll be about it all!

I recently explained to my godson (he's almost 3) about my blood testing. He had been to the doctor to get a blood test and had a little plaster on his arm one day when I visited. I told him that I could also test my blood sugar just like the doc tested his.

He now knows that I keep all my diabetic stuff in a pink pencil case in my handbag. He knows that I take the blood meter out first, then when I hand him a test strip he knows how to put it in for me. The rest is up to me, but I made it interesting for him by telling him he was to listen for the 'beep' when I tested!

Now when I go into my handbag, he points at the pink pencilcase and says 'beep beep'!!

Angie, I hope this gets better for you...

x

[archimeech]

Angie, I'm sure he loves you, but some guys have to be beaten silly (most times figuratively, sometimes literally) before they realize that they're being an ***. Being worried about someone, and not discussing a potentially life threatening issue are very different.
We love you, honey. :flowers:

[jdstein11]

Angie, good 4 u 4 telling the boy! And I'm not sure your bf is the best one to tell his son, since you obviously are much better prepared to articulate the issues, procedures, etc., than he is. Your bf should, however, be there with you to talk to his son about your diabetes so it appears that everyone's on the same page and united. Kids really do pick up on these things, and I believe that it's better for both parents to be present when bringing up issues with their kids.

As for the scary stuff, I think you should just let your bf's son know what you'll need if you go really low, e.g., a soda, etc., but that you are very careful with your bg levels and don't think that will happen, but that you just wanted him to know so he can help you. Kids need to be reassured that they're safe and that their world is safe, and unless you go scary low often, making him worry about it isn't necessary. Empowering him may help to keep him involved and take some of the mystery out of diabetes.

As for your bf, I agree with the others and that there's nothing confrontational about asking him flat-out why he doesn't want to talk about your diabetes. I think that you should tell him how his unwillingness to talk about your diabetes makes you feel and that you're concerned that there are other issues present that need to be worked out. At least you'll have a chance to dig and understand his motivation.

Good luck!

[Kady38]

My son was 10 when I became very ill and had to spend a week in the hospital and was diagnosed with diabetes.
Of course, it was obvious that something was wrong.
I told him everything. He even wanted to know what it felt like to check my blood, so we checked his. He has tried sugar free foods and drinks.
I also wanted him to know what to do, if I wouldn't wake up or was un responsive in any way, ( I hope this never happens to him, but) Many times we are the only ones in the house. My husband works out of town.
I fell it is very important to be honest with your children, and educate them on the facts and what do to in case of emergency should it happen
Children can sense when something is wrong, or hear small bits of conversations by adults and become scared. When you are honest and upfront from the begining you may avoid some problems.