Did you feel this way when you where a teen?

[nantomsuethom]

Or pre-teen?

I am contsantly having to remind Thomas that he has diabetes!!

He is always putting "a bite" of something (lately it's candy) in his mouth. If I ask him if he checked his bg before eating he usually says "no" or do you know how many carbs are in that?, he says "I can guess" or an "Oh well":banghead:

Also, his bg has been really crazy for the past 2 weeks. I don't think its from him eating stuff he shouldn't be eating. I have increased his basals a few times this week already.

Last night we went to the movies, all he had was a small thing of nachos and a diet soda. He bolused for it and about 1 hour later he was 340's:hmpf: . He ended up taking 15u total. Then by 4am he woke up at 54, drank a juice and woke up at 8am at 88. Had breakfast and stayed above 200-250's until dinner then he was 320!! He took a shot this time (I told him to take 7u but he decided to take 10u:fight: ) and after dinner he was 450!! So he bolused another 5u and 1 hour later he was 180's and 1/2 after that 121 and dropping!! At 8:30 he drank a juice and went to bed.:dontknow:

Will a growth spurt cause bg levels to do this. I know it do crazy things but THIS CRAZY!!?

[JediSkipdogg]

Yes, he will change alot as he goes through puberty. Also he may be slightly sick at this time causing wacko readings. I have had nothing but readings all over the place for unknown reasons for about the past few weeks.

Over time though his insulin requirements will change slightly. I know I have continually upped my basal rate from when I was first on the pump. I think in 4 years time I have increased it by 25%.

I wish you luck with it, but he has alot going on right now. And puberty is a big one.

[Penny]

Recently, my stepdaughter was complaing about her 13 year old son being so difficult. I told her he is a teenager, it's his job to be difficult. All you can do is present him with the facts, give him the means to do the right thing, and hope the things you have taught him hang around the edge of his mind. I even remember being a teenager, back in prehistoric times. I did not want to do the things I was told to do, even if I knew they were good for me. Most of the time I did though, but I sure hated everyone always telling me what to do. Think about it, weren't you the same way? Didn't you pull that hated hat off your head, as soon as you were beyond a point where your mother could see you? You froze all the way to school, but at least you were cool. Did you dump your milk in the sink, when Mom's back was turned. I bet you bought Pepsi and chips instead of the good lunch you were supposed to get. I know it is different because your son has a life threatening disease, but he does too. He just doesn't want to always be told about it...he's a kid, trying to show you how grown up he is. Wish I could tell you he will straighten out, he may, but he will probably get worse before he gets better.

[sydneya]

I can't imagine being an adolescent with diabetes. The numbers will probably be all over the place every time there is a growth spurt or a hormone change. I have no knowledge how to handle it. I do know that teaching correct principals can be all you can do. With his age and circumstances even if he really stays on a good program, he will have time of all over the place numbers.
Good luck. Showing him unconditional love will probably do more good than anything else. It sounds like you are all ready doing that so....... Take care of yourself, too. He needs you to be healthy.

[am1977]

Hey, hang in there...teenagers can be tough (I think he's entering that stage-correct me if I am wrong). Now if I remember correctly, he usually tests himself pretty frequently (like 10x a day or more?)...has that changed? If that's the case, maybe he's going through a state of denial in a ways. I know you know this, but to deal with diabetes 24/7 is not easy for anyone whether an child, teen, or even adult...he may need a day or two here and there, to forget (within reason) that he's a diabetic and just do teenage things. Then once he has that day, get back on track. But if you think it's more serious than that, maybe try taking over part of his diabetes management...like doing the testing or helping with site changes.

I know it's not an easy thing to manage (believe me, I know :rolleyes: ), but I really think you are doing a good job.

Good luck and keep us posted :wink:

[nantomsuethom]

Wish I could tell you he will straighten out, he may, but he will probably get worse before he gets better.
NOOOOO :vroam:
He is actually a pretty good kid even though he has given me A LOT of grey hair!
He does still check his bg about 10x a day, more so when he is off, like tonight.
Maybe I do get on him too much sometimes but I am afraid he will be even worse if I didn't. He is never home when not in school, unless he has homework. He plays outside with his friends most of the time. The past 2 weeks that we were out of school I hardly ever saw him (or my daughter) unless it was time to eat. I think this is a good thing but its hard to keep up with him.
We go back to school tomorrow. He thinks his bgs will be better starting tomorrow.

[Jak]

Nancy, first of all, yes, growth spurts and puberty hormones can cause bg's to go haywire. In my teens, I was on almost twice the amount of insulin that I'm on now. (Mind you, I look after myself a lot better these days.) Keep in mind, however, that he may be eating things he is not telling you about and that, too, will have an effect on his bg's especially if he is not bolusing for them.

Once upon a time, I was a pre-teen/teenager with diabetes, so maybe I can offer a bit of insight. First, the reasons for Thomas behaving the way he does are probably diverse and won't always be the same for the same behaviour.

Some days he may simply want the food and eat it regardless of its effect on his bg's. Other days he may be "telling" you that he can eat what he wants no matter what you say -- in effect, rebelling. He may be starting to assert his independence and take control (if you can call it that) of his situation. He will decide what he can eat, when he can eat it, and if he will decide what to bolus for it. His thinking may be along the lines of it's my diabetes, not yours. And as such, he will proceed to treat it that way.

He may be rebelling against the thought of having diabetes at all -- a kind of "I didn't ask to play this game, so you can't make me follow the rules." He may be looking for some freedom from the relentless testing, calculating carbs, bolusing, etc. He simply may be tired of bothering, or he may want to experience the freedom his friends have.

Possibly, he may be testing to see what will happen if he doesn't "follow" the rules. Will he feel any worse? See any worse? Get an infection that won't clear up? Lose a limb? Have kidney failure?

If this is ever his line of thinking, he needs to understand that the immediate effects will different from the long-term effects. What he will see/feel is a general increase in not feeling good, increased thirst, headaches, blurred vision, crabbiness/crankiness, etc. The cumulative damage that leads to the major complications takes years to develop and is easy to ignore because the person can't see it happening until the damage is done.

Your dueling icons and the 7 unit/10 unit issue tells me that there is a control issue, at least to some degree. It's that, or maybe Thomas is starting to get a "feel" for how much insulin he really needs. (I do that even now. The rules tell me I should bolus a certain amount, but I have the feeling I need more or less and adjust accordingly. Generally, but not always, I am right.) There is also the possibility that Thomas may be taking the extra units because he plans to eat (or has already eaten) something he hasn't told you about.

I think it might be a good idea for you to talk to his doctor or endo without Thomas being present to explain what is happening. Then have him see his doctor without you being present. That way, if there are authority/control issues arising, he may discuss it more freely and a solution may be forthcoming.

Jak

[Cinnabon]

Nan...
yes this is VERY difficult, this age and having DIabetes. I'm not saying that Thomas is doing this, but I remember I would sneak around goodies because I couldn't accept being 9 years old and not being able to enjoy everything else. I came from a very old way of controlling diabetes and was never taught how you are able to enjoy food but bolus, UNFORTUNATELY. His growth spurt does affect his readings but I would maybe try to observe even though I would get some goodies while at school too. This is a tough age, not that being any other age is easier, but let alone for Diabetes.

[DeusXM]

I was diagnosed when I was 14 so I probably missed out on the worst part of teenage diabetes. However, there's one thing that's common to all teenagers, diabetic or not. The last thing any teenager want is Mum fussing over them like they're a child. When you're a teenager, you want all the perks of being treated like an adult with all the safety net of being treated like a child.

Obviously I'm in no position to start giving out parenting advice, but what I would have wanted as a teenager with diabetes would be for me to take full responsibility for my condition and without my parents constantly over my shoulder.

The one thing I've always been grateful for when I was diagnosed was that my parents made a conscious decision to let me be the one responsible for my condition. That meant it was me who always had to do my injections, me who always had to do my blood tests, me who had to record all my results, me who had to renew and pick up my prescriptions.

Because the buck stopped very firmly with me, it meant that I took a lot more responsibility for myself and it meant that if I made any mistakes, I could only blame myself. Most importantly though, it made me feel like I was the adult in control, instead of being the sick kid who always needed his parents around.

During puberty you can pretty much kiss goodbye to tight control - it's simply not going to happen. The best you can hope for is damage limitation. It's totally unreasonable to expect someone in Thomas' position to stay rigidly between 5-7 mmol/l most of the time. He's going to have to learn how to control his diabetes himself without relying on you. The only way to learn is the hard way, unfortunately. Why not introduce him to the rest of us? If he's able to ask us any questions directly, then he's the one going to feel in control, and it'll encourage him to be responsible too.

[nantomsuethom]

Thank you all for your replies. They really got me thinking.

I feel like I want control over his diabetes to protect him from having long term complications (I am tearing up as I type this). He at times wants me to take control of it. But there are a lot of times lately that he doesn't want to tell me what his bgs are running. He did call me 2x at work this morning to tell me his bg was over 350 (105 when he went to bed). I told him not to check again for about 30 min. and he said I will check again in 10 and call you back.
Now he is in school and I am going to worry all day!

He did have a major growth spurt recently. I didn't really notice since I am with him everyday, but my aunt who hadn't seen him in 3 weeks could not believe how much taller he had gotten in that short of time. I know he will not have very good control for the next few years, his endo told us that too, but I didn't expect these crazy numbers!

We actually give him a lot of freedom when it comes to foods and snacks since he has a pump, so I don't think (or hope not) he is eating without telling us or bolusing. He doesn't tell us everything because he is not home all the time but he is usually pretty good about doing what needs to be done.
I did tell him over the weekend that snacks are going to be cut back for now just because no one in our house needs them. He wasn't too happy about that.

I would love for him to talk with you all, or even the kids at school that have diabetes, but he is VERY shy and wont.

Even though I have told him what can happen down the road, it doesn't any affect on him. I think at this age they can't "see" into the future. They have that "wont happen to me attitude". I look into the future and cry thinking what can happen to him. I have been told that I worry too much! I am working on that.

[Penny]

I also remember that all our boys seemed to be bottomless pits at Thomas's age. They were always hungry, and our grocery bills were unbelievable. I can't imagine having to deal with that phase and diabetes. About the only control you have of what he eats, is to not have the junk food around the house, but have plenty of nutricious food. (I can remember buying a bag of oranges and my son eating them all, almost before I unpacked the rest of the groceries, when he was 13.) That doesn't mean he won't get the junk food someplace else, but you help where you can. I agree with Deusx though, he has to take resonsibility for most of his diabeties.

[amccrazgrl]

I remember I got dx'd the Easter before my 13th bday (2 weeks before).
Im glad that I didn't get dx'd until I was almost 13 so I could have a basically normal childhood. I can't imagine getting it like at 2 yrs old and having to go thru everything.

[Mick]

Nancy--

I think in a way, all the testing/correcting/retesting etc. we do nowadays tends to make our sugars bounce around a lot, and makes us a bit crazy as well. I was diabetic when I was your son's age, but that was 40 years ago. No meters, no adjustments, just how I felt, and what I could get away with. Yes, I did figure out early on that if I stuck myself with some extra insulin, I could get away with 'cheating' on occasion. I didn't do it too often. I also figured out that, while my mom was still checking my urine tests, that I could manipulate the results by putting in more drops of water and less drops of urine. Another kind of 'cheating', only this was more a kind of lying. By the time I began high school, she stopped checking, and I basically stopped testing--those old urine tests never told us anything useful anyway, and we didn't exactly have permission from the doctor to adjust insulin amounts either. What I'm getting at is this--In the first 20 years I was diabetic (ages 12-32, from 1965-1985), I never knew what my sugars were. I could feel when I was low. Occasional urine testing could tell me if I was very high, but for most of that period of time, I was utterly on my own. Since we had little information about our immediate condition and even less skill at self-regulating, we just went with the flow. My mom tended to trust me (I was also a 'good kid'), and sometimes I did not earn that trust. But with some skill, some luck and decent compliance, I have gone 40 healthy years with this disease, half of that without any of the technology we find indispensible today. Your son is going to have sole ownership of his diabetes sooner or later--at his age (I have a 15-year old son, so I'm smack in the middle of this myself!), he is able to begin taking ownership. Which means YOU giving it up. That's the harder part. Because he's gonna make errors, both in technique and in judgement. He's going to lie to himself and have consequences. His failures and errors will, hopefully, bring him closer and closer to an adult model of control with freedom, compliance with spontaneaty, good sense with joyous living. And he'll need to arrive at that by the time he leaves for college--and that is not all that far off!

Yer gonna have to butt out and let him take over--good luck!

Happy New Year!
Michael
T1 since 1965

PS--oh, by the way--as far as the "bottomless pit" teenage boy thing... My son is upstairs in the kitchen right now devouring, I'd guess, a 1500 calorie snack of leftovers from New Years. I've seen him put away 1000 calories in 15 minutes, and then eat a double dinner portion--another 2000 calories--an hour later. Followed 2 hours after that by yet another dinner--the sequal. I'd guess the kid has been known to eat 6000 calories in a day, easy. He's 5' 7", and only 130 lbs, so all the food seems to just get burned up by his metabolism! Teen boys--the amounts they can eat can make your head spin!

[DeusXM]

I look into the future and cry thinking what can happen to him. I have been told that I worry too much! I am working on that.

In the nicest possible way, you are worrying too much. A couple of years or so with slightly higher BG levels isn't going to do much to cause problems in Thomas ' future. In fact I rather doubt that any teenager in puberty actually runs at normal BG levels, diabetic or not. This is only a temporary phase and so it's probably best to not get too worked up about it, because in the blink of an eye it'll be gone.

Furthermore, if Mike was able to get through puberty without having any firm idea of where his BG was (or without modern insulins) and still has all his legs and everything else, then I think your son is going to be just fine too.

[Belinda]

Here is my two cents........being the teacher of eighth graders.....
It is a phase of puberty...it comes with love, independance, dependancy and ATTITUDE..... I feel that he is going through those stages of teenagers. It could be alot worse...Thomas could decide not to even check his BS. I commend him for checking as much as he does at his age... On the other hand during puberty the numbers are all out of wack and a growth spurt to boot (he may need more insulin due to size change) .....Maybe now that he is back in school and on a routine again it will help even out some of the numbers. It is normal for ;you to worry your a mother but just remember that it is his disease and he will have to take charge. Make him do all he can for himself in his control and don't let up.

[nantomsuethom]

Ok, I worried all day for nothing. :embarasse His bg came down to 88 before lunch. He took care of it himself!:thumbsup: I knew he could.
I couldn't help to ask him though as soon as he got home how his bgs were during the day. His response, "normal" "until now" he was 250's or so. So I did make bolus ratio changes for the whole day.
I am going to try really hard to stand back and watch, and sneak peaks at his meter when he's not looking.:whistling

Thank you all so much for your support!!
You guys are great!!:rock:

[Penny]

[QUOTE=nantomsuethom] and sneak peaks at his meter when he's not looking.:whistling

[SIZE="3"][/SIZE/QUOTE]

Oh course you will, you want him to be independent, but he is still your baby! Mine is 38 and I would still peek! :D

[SugaryOne]

I'm a teenager and let me tell you, at his age Thomas' blood sugars will be hectic. Mine are quite the same way. It's normal. The best you can do for now is gently remind him to test before each meal, not during or after.

My question is: why isn't Thomas taking care of his own insulin doses? How long has he been diagnosed? If he's newly diagnosed I can understand.

[Batty]

totally normal. i was a moody little b when i was a pre-teen/teen to my mom about my diabetes. its a drag when you're growing up because you're told you can't do this and that..which only makes you pissed off because of course you want to do this and that like every other kid on the planet is doing except you(or so it feels like). i don't carb count i never have, and i did eat candy when i was growing up..as much as my mom tried to keep me from eating it and i never did or do now test before i eat something unless i know i've had more sugar than i should that day. it's just the faze you go through. my puberty blood sugar level bounces went on for many many years no matter how much we changed my doses. my doctor told us it's because of hormones and its one of the hardest times for a diabetic but it will be over soon. just about a year ago i started having better controlled levels, and now pretty much eat whatever i want whenever i want and don't have as much trouble with my levels as i used to. but the only way you're gonna get through it though with him now is if you realize that as much as you want him to be okay..nagging him isn't the answer. i don't mean stop asking him questions or reminding him..if my mom hadn't done that i donno how many times i would've forgotten my insulin before bed or not eaten breakfast before school..but she also learned to give me my space(after about two years of straight fighting every two days about my diabetes) and let me learn how to deal with the diabetes myself without having to rely on her like i'd done for so many years. by the time i was 15, it sometimes even slipped my moms mind for a short period of time during the day that i actually had diabetes because instead of coming to her everytime i did my insulin to ask how much to take, or asking if i could eat something and such day to day stuff. it helped when i could do that for myself, because it gave me more freedom and instead of hating the fact that i had diabetes and couldn't eat whatever i wanted all the time and such that my friends were doing around me all the time..i accepted that i couldn't always have a slurpee or candy or pig out on junk food that would make my blood sugars go higher. and i was actually happy(most of my friends didnt know i had diabetes until they saw one of my lows for the first time, because i never made a big deal of it unless they were around when i was fighting with my mom) and didn't care that i was "different."

so don't stop reminding him once in a while but try and give him a little more space, watch him of course but silently unless he is about to eat a bunch of chocolate bars or something that really won't help him. get him to do his own insulin doses(i'm not sure what insulin his on and how many times a day and all that, but him learning to take responsably for himself in that department is a good thing) and maybe have a little talk with him about what you're gonna start doing with him, and that he'll have to watch what he eats himself..and give it a test run for a day or two and see what he does and then talk to him afterwards about his choices and what happened when he made them.(of course, make sure he doesn't go low or too high, but don't step in the second you see him eating something).

i donno, that's my suggestion. it took a lot of fighting with my mom to get freedom and accept my diabetes, but i'd probably still be relying her for my doses and such if she hadn't slowly let me start doing things myself.(i still ask her for help, her job of taking care of my diabetes isnt over..but now i don't ask her unless i'm confused about something.)

[nantomsuethom]

Thomas is pretty good about taking care of himself for the most part. He does everything for himself during the day before and after school, and now that I backed off a little, he does his even more for himself after school.
The only thing I did since this post was changed his pump settings, big changes! That is something I am not comfortable having him do yet.
Since the changes his bg levels have been great.
Because he has a pump we do allow him to have more junk food than he should have. If we are in the store and he wants a candy bar, I usually let him have it. If he is at a friends house he eats whatever they are eating. Most of our neighbors know now that he can have just about anything.
I did tell him yesterday that I HATE pizza. His bgs are way off when he eats it.

Thank you all for your replies.
It's great to hear from those of you that have gone through this as a teen.

[Erin]

Nancy,

I think you'll find that when you back off Thomas will come to YOU asking for advice/help when he needs it.

As a teenager you're constantly rebelling, trying to take control of your life, but then when your parents give it to you it's scary and *usually* you run back. :)

You will always worry, but the more control you give Thomas now, the better prepared he'll be when *gasp* he moves out, and probably into a college dorm (where ramen noodles, pizza, beer, and whatever somebody's mom sent in a care package, are the standard food groups)

Something my mom always did, that I think you do too, that I thank her for to-this-day, was make me an active participant in all of the diabetes care stuff, even the stuff she didn't feel comfortable letting me do myself. Since I was "in it" from the beginning, I knew how to take care of myself. I also knew what i could "get away with" in my teens.

At that age kids are doing things / eating things that they might not want to tell their mother about (I'm not talking about sex drugs and rock and roll, I'm talking innocent stuff... like getting a plate of french fries for lunch instead of eating the sack lunch their parents made for them, or running around doing something that would horrify their mother... I'm not a guy but the thing that springs to mind is when my friends used to try to bobsled in the grocery store parking lot, using the shopping carts as sleds) He doesn't want to tell you he walked a mile in the snow without a hat to the pizza place after school, but he wants to take a couple of extra units to cover it... I say good for him!

I was just talking to my dad this weekend and he said the best... and scariest... and hardest... decision my parents ever made was to take a completely hands-off approach to my diabetes care once I turned like 15 or 16. My mom was a nervous wreck for years, and she'd dump my blood sugar meter's memory every chance she got (which was rare 'cause I carried the thing everywhere) so she could check up on me, but I went off to college confident in what I was doing with my diabetes care, and able to navigate the grown up world without killing myself in the process. (In fact I had better a1c readings in college than when I was living at home :) something my mom was at the same time proud and ashamed of... proud that she brought me up right, but ashamed that I was better at controlling my blood sugars than she was!)

Take a deep breath, relax, and stop worrying. If I survived my teens, anybody can survive their teens!

[Welcome2DBlock]

im actualyl really like him right now... and im 17. I also sometime syou know pop that piece of candy and guesstimate how many carbs are in it. My mom sometimes complains that I had better control when I was 10 and was first starting out with it. I try to test for the most part but when running late to school I sometimes miss that one and going to dinner with friends it sometimes gets skipped to.I tell my mom it isn't as easy as she thinks and if it was it wouldnt be such a resky disease if it was that easy. I know it is hard to control a kdi as a parent because you can't really keep him at home 24/7, and cannot moniter him all the time. You must have faith in your child and know that when it comes down to it I imagine he tries the best he can.

[ghostrider]

Im 15 rite now and yeah i constantly find myself eating something without checking or insulin like its not big deal but as im growing my bg is terriable I cant wait to get it back under control everyone tells me its because im growing i hope thats all it is and dont ease off to much on him i found myself having to do almost everything myself because i think my parents thought that they were getting to involved but it actually helps alot and i told them that and now there giving me a hand and things are starting to work out a bit better

[nantomsuethom]

Thomas asks for help when he doesn't want to calculate his carbs. If he eats something easy he does it himself otherwise I hear "Mom can you make me something to eat?"

I did check his bg before I went to bed last night because he had a snack and didn't check his bg before eating and bolusing. He said he feels "normal" and didn't feel he needed to correct. Of course when I went to bed his bg was 238, so I just corrected him while he slept (so he didn't know).

I can say that the pump is great for the growth spurts. When I first started this post I didn't think he was going to have good bgs ever again (well for a while anyway). I made changes to his basals and bolus ratios and they are pretty much back to normal range.

I don't want to rush time because I miss every year that passes, but I can't wait until the growth spurts and hormone changes end!

[ghostrider]

but I can't wait until the growth spurts and hormone changes end!

I cant wait either and the bad part is i just jumped another growth chart doesnt look like im gonna be stopping anytime soob :marchmell