[Patient254]

Congratulations on your pregnancy! What a gift!

[walleyedave]

I have 2 kids and the third on the way. My wife and i would never even consider this. My oldest is 12 years old, my wife was 18 when she got pregnant. There have been rough spots in our lives and many bumps along the way, but one thing is for sure and that is that i can not imagine not having him hear with us. I think a life is a life. If you decide to abort this pregnancy, you will regret it the rest of your life. You will always wonder how he or she would have turned out. It will play on your mind for the rest of your life. Being a parent to a child is the single most rewarding thing you will ever do in your entire life. But ultimatly the decision is yours. Keeping the baby will be something you will not regret.

[nicole]

Again thanks to the ones who truly understand what I'm going through.

This is not easy. I don't want to go hrough with it especially if there is a chance there could be something wrong with it seeing that I didn't have great control over my diabetes when it happened.

In the mean time I'll keep you all posted on my final desicion.

[mell1682]

Originally Posted by nicole

This is not easy. I don't want to go hrough with it especially if there is a chance there could be something wrong with it seeing that I didn't have great control over my diabetes when it happened.

In the mean time I'll keep you all posted on my final desicion.

One last thing, and I hope I don't come across as pushy cuz I'm soooo not like that (ask my kids lol), but I have to say one thing about "ideal" control and pregnancy. I was NOT even close to being in control with either baby...I had an A1C of 11% when they both were conceived and it was so scary to think that there might be something wrong with them and it would've been MY fault. It was so stupid of me to get pregnant with such wacky control but at that time I never thought diabetics could even GET pregnant (yeah I still can't explain THAT train of thought!). After 2 very closely monitored pregnancies, my girls came out healthy and strong. I am so amazed with them cuz I honestly don't know how they came out of my unhealthy (at the time) body with nothing wrong. Don't let anyone here or anywhere make you feel bad for ANY choice you make because they, nor I, are in your shoes and it's your life and there is a lot to think about and unfortunately you probably don't have much time to ponder. Sending some hugs and hoping you make the best decision for you.

[Keezheekoni]

Originally Posted by mell1682

Don't let anyone here or anywhere make you feel bad for ANY choice you make because they, nor I, are in your shoes and it's your life and there is a lot to think about and unfortunately you probably don't have much time to ponder. Sending some hugs and hoping you make the best decision for you.

On another forum I'm on, we have the same smiley, only his says, "Yeah that!"

So that too.

[nicole]

Mell1682 & Keezheekoni,

Thank you so much!!

I'm sooo glad that you two understand me the most. It means alot. Nope you don't sound pushy at all, lol.

Yeah my A1C is around there. And you said your kids came out fine?

That makes me feel 100x's better knowing that there is still a chance that it will be ok if we do decide to go through with it.

We talked again tonight and we have agreed to talk to a few people before we make our final decision. So I'll keep you all posted.

[UpNorth]

Congratulations to being pregnant!

I'd say, talk with your parents, and his parents about this. If the people around you don't know, they can't help and support you either. They might get mad at first, but that will very likely change into being the proudest and most caring grandparents on the planet. 19 really isn't that young, i know someone who had a son just weeks after finishing junior high school. She was just about old enough to legally jump in between the sheets when she got pregnant. And today? She's doing really well.

Even if you and your boyfriend don't have jobs now, surely there must be someone around who can help you in the very beginning until at least one of you have a job. Living with parents... Awkward maybe, but just imagine the posibilities! That child will have his or her grandparents very close, and you'll always have someone to ask about baby care, and a babysitter around.

From what i can see in the first post. Both you and your boyfriend seems really happy about this pregnancy too, so if i were you, i'd go through the pregnancy. 9 months is a long time so there's still lots of time to find jobs and everything. And i'm sure you can get help from your families too. Who knows, if you abort this time, maybe when you are ready to have children, and want it, then it might be more difficult to get pregnant. My parents tried for years before they got me and yup, i have old parents I mean, how fun is it to be 23 and have both parents being well over 50? From my experience i can say it's no fun at all! I don't know how long i'll have them around, or if my children in the future will have their grandparents around for long. Thinking about that saddens me everyday, and sometimes makes me cry too.

Think carefully before you decide what to do. But from seeing how friends have taken it, an abortion is really really difficult! I'd NEVER want to go through an abortion unless i got pregnant from being raped or something like that.

If your A1c isn't brilliant now, but okish, it shouldn't be a big problem to carry the child, if you A1c was a disaster you'd probably not have managed to become pregnant in the first place. Just make sure you get a team who knows how to deal with diabetic pregnancies if you decide to become a mum.

[lorilei]

Nicole, it is your choice...you don't live with any of us or owe us any explainations, and we certainly shouldn't try to sway you one way or the other based on our own personal beliefs. Wishing you good luck and peace.

[Jan B]

Nicole,

I really like that you are not making a snap decision. You are trying to get your head around it all. I know you don't have a lot of time, but you have enough time to make this decision that will be part of your life forever.

My belief is that all the stories about other people's experiences (good and bad) are helping get you a little better feel of things, BUT, this is between You, your boyfriend, and dare I say . . . God. The "three" of you can decide. Your parents, if you include them, may be helpful too. I hope so anyway.

I pray for the best for all involved.

Also, if you were my daughter (which I would love to have had), I would hug and hold you and let you tell me all you were feeliing.

[Jan B]

Originally Posted by Jan B

Nicole,

You, your boyfriend, and dare I say . . . God. The "three" of you can decide. Your parents, if you include them, may be helpful too. I hope so anyway.

After thinking longer, I really need to clarify God. From my perspective, and what I meant, was go higher than yourself, a place where you go for comfort, love, strength, and ultimately answers (for me, and my beliefs, that's God, my Father who loves me more than my own parents loved me.)

Relax. Better decisions are made when not in haste! You are loved; love yourself; then lastly, whatever your decision, don't look back, let your decision stand and don't take guilt with you into your future. That would just be an opinion from someone who wishes the best for you.

[geegies]

Hi! I second the things that UpNorth has said- she has brought up a lot of good points! It was unexpected news, and whatever you choose, it will have an impact on both you and your boyfriend for the rest of your life. It is a hard decision to make, and it is better to take time to seriously consider the outcome. My advice would be to please not make this decision too quickly- take awhile to think about it.

It's very encouraging to hear that so many people have had successful pregnancies with all ranges of diabetic control (I've been doing a little research on other threads in this forum, too!), and it truly seems that you have a good chance to have a healthy baby.

It seems like you have many resources available to you- with grandparents nearby and quite a bit of time to try for a job. I wholeheartedly wish you all the best in this process and will be praying that everything works out for what is best for you!

[nicole]

Yeah I'm definitely trying to take my time and make the right decision.

But I have to make that decision soon though. You know before its too late.

[hodgsonsurvivor]

Nicole...I had my babies at 16 and 19. My diabetes was not under control. Both babies are strong and healthy young ladies now. I'm glad I kept them, I wouldn't want to put my body through a pregnancy now and I definitely wanted children. I've since earned 3 degrees and gotten a great job. You can do whatever you put your mind to. These blessings aren't granted all the time and there is purpose for this child's life, whether you raise it or not. Find peace...

[nicole]

Originally Posted by hodgsonsurvivor

Nicole...I had my babies at 16 and 19. My diabetes was not under control. Both babies are strong and healthy young ladies now. I'm glad I kept them, I wouldn't want to put my body through a pregnancy now and I definitely wanted children. I've since earned 3 degrees and gotten a great job. You can do whatever you put your mind to. These blessings aren't granted all the time and there is purpose for this child's life, whether you raise it or not. Find peace...

Thank You

When I read that something hit me and made me feel so much better.

[lugnut48]

We just had ours last week Sunday - it is an amazing gift to have a child. I'm not sure why anyone would want to be selfish because it's inconvenient for them to have a child so they instead destroy that gift.

There's always the selfless decision of putting him / her up for adoption - that way everyone wins! You get out of having to grow up and be responsible and the child lives! Win-win situation in my opinion.

Good luck!