Health issues w/ my son...need to vent!

[rak1978]

Good morning, everyone!
I hope you guys don't mind, but I really need to vent a little. Here goes....

I was 8 weeks pregnant or so when I was diagnosed. The onset (which happened over a few months prior to diagnosis) was fairly slow, so there was no major event/medical emergency that led me to think I had diabetes....other than the fact that I lost a TON of weight quickly, had sugar in my urine for about a year at various dr visits, and had a gtt in hand that I didn't get done (boy, was I clueless!!!). Anyway......I was 8 weeks pregnant w/ the official diagnosis. Which means during those crucial weeks, my blood sugar was most likely way out of control. I went on to get immediate medical treatment and had fairly good sugars the rest of the pregnancy.
Fast forward 5 1/2 years to the present......
My son, who is just the sweetest thing, has MANY medical issues. He has a very severe/life threatening allergy to all nuts, he has a suspected gluten intolerance, he doesn't tolerate most dairy, he can't have lots of fruit (gi issues), and most recently he has been getting migraine episodes which cause him to vomit.

I can't help but feel that this has something to do with those 8 weeks in the womb w/ my hostile blood sugar levels. My other kids do not have these issues and I had well controlled levels while pregnant with them.


Uggghhhh. Vent over.

[princesslinda]

I don't think you should blame yourself. I've seen too many people who smoked, drank, took various meds before knowing they were pregnant (and some who continued bad habits throughout the pregnancy) who had babies with no health issues. I don't have answers to why things happen the way they do, but blaming yourself or feeling guilty is not the way to go. As you mentioned above, once you were aware of your diabetes, you did everything possible to have a safe pregnancy.

((Hugs))

[rak1978]

Thank you, Linda! It's not that I'm necessarily blaming myself. Other than being clueless about diabetes, I don't feel like it's my fault so much as I just wonder if that time period of uncontrolled blood sugars had something to do with the present health issues for him. I guess I'm blaming diabetes, not myself...I see the distinction.
Doctors won't admit a connection, but I still wonder....

Thanks for the hugs. That's really what I needed today. He just had a bad migraine episode last night and my heart breaks for him.

[foxl]

I agree -- I am jsut fine and my mom smoked, drank, and took mixed upper-downer pills during her pregnancy with me.

Oh.

[notme]

Mom's love to blame themselves for everything. Your a good Mom, Rachell. I would bet money that your blood sugar had nothing to do with your son's allergies. Just one of those unfortunate things.

On the bright side, your son sounds like an amazing guy!

[jwags]

Nobody knows why certain things happen. All my pregnancies were exactly the same and I ate the same thing and exercised and did everything right. I had 5 healthy babies and one who was perfectly formed but born stillborn. I was devastated. They even did an autopsy to rule out any gentetic abnormalities. They found nothing. The doctor's answer was some things just happen. Food sensitivites and allergies could be caused by the environment, enzymes in the body or even introducing foods too early. I know they always tell breast feeding moms to avoid certain foods to prevent some of this. But I am seeing more and more kids with all sorts of allergies now a days and I am sure most of their moms aren't diabetic.

[Jan B]

Hi Rachel,

My little son had heart defects and died very young. I'll probably blame myself for the rest of my life (with diabetic mother in large print on his hospital paperwork, that didn't help!). I also chose to not have any more children. But as others have said, those things happen and that's just the way it is. Blaming ones self does no good at all; I'm glad that's not really what you are doing.

It's often the case that childhood allergies eventually go away. I was allergic to many things (eggs, evergreens, sand, etc.) and have no allergies today. Plus my precious little brother (now 40) suffered horrible migraines until he was about 16. They often came on after strenuous sports activities. Children have a lot of problems they just manage to deal with, and as a parent, it's natural to hurt for them. They do really hurt, but they tend to forget easier and rush on enjoying life - easier than us older people let ourselves do at times.

[rak1978]

Jan, It breaks my heart what happened to your son. I can't imagine how painful that would be. So sorry!!! You need the hug!!!
Regarding the allergies going away....I've been told that his nut allergies will not go away. The fact that he tested so severely to so many different types makes it VERY unlikely that he'll grow out of it. The gluten, dairy, and fruit problems will probably fade w/ time...and retraining of his gut.
The migraines are hard (those are diagnosed by me, by the way, not a doctor...so we're not positive). He gets a terrible headache, throws up, sleeps for a few hours, and then wakes up good as new. Ready for food. He did have a few episodes last year, but they are getting more frequent. He had one both last week and then again last night. I'm hoping they don't continue to become more frequent.
Like I said before, I really am not blaming myself, but I might be blaming diabetes a little bit. It just seems that he inherited the "my body is not my friend" gene.

Thanks for letting me unload here. I know it's sort of a personal issue, but it's weighing heavily on me today.

[Jan B]

Rachel,

My little brother had episodes similar to your son and they started before he was 8 I believe . . . I'll have to ask him. I'm 9 years older than him, so I was going about my teenage life not having the compassion a mom would have. I was just glad I wasn't the one sleeping in the bathroom with the lights out. Sometimes he would have several episodes a week, and at times he would go a week or more with nothing at all. Over time, they became less often until no more! I'm sure you have read and found possible triggers. With my brother, sports seemed to bring episodes on (but it wasn't always clear cut), but there was no way he was giving sports up.

The nut allergies are scary indeed, because they aren't always evident -- those little buggers show up where you might not think. I know you will do your absolute best.

Thanks for your hug Rachel. My little Joshua was born in 1984 and lived 5 1/2 months. Time has healed in many ways; I try to be positive, and I'm glad so much has been learned about how diabetics can have healthy children. My pregnancy was unplanned, but there was no way I was going to abort. Junk happens, and how we deal with it is critical. There is some saying like, it's not what happens, but how you deal with it that matters the most. His pain ended a long time ago. Gosh, I don't mean to sound morbid, just real! Plus, this thread is not about me, but you dear Rachel!

[rak1978]

Gosh, I don't mean to sound morbid, just real! Plus, this thread is not about me, but you dear Rachel!

Jan, you can talk about your little guy ANYTIME you want!!! My heart truly breaks for you. So sad. There just aren't any words!
I would be thoroughly disappointed if the thread was JUST about me! This is a place for us ALL to come to discuss our issues, right?

So, the never ending drama....
My son (the 5 yr old) was completely fine yesterday after what I thought was a migraine episode the night before. UNTIL the middle of the night last night. He came in our room shaking and cold, with a headache, stomach ache, and nearly 104 fever.
He just can't seem to catch a break. He is very resilient though!
Thanks again, everyone, for reading my venting. I needed to unload yesterday!

[aiah23]

Jan, you can talk about your little guy ANYTIME you want!!! My heart truly breaks for you. So sad. There just aren't any words!
I would be thoroughly disappointed if the thread was JUST about me! This is a place for us ALL to come to discuss our issues, right?

So, the never ending drama....
My son (the 5 yr old) was completely fine yesterday after what I thought was a migraine episode the night before. UNTIL the middle of the night last night. He came in our room shaking and cold, with a headache, stomach ache, and nearly 104 fever.
He just can't seem to catch a break. He is very resilient though!
Thanks again, everyone, for reading my venting. I needed to unload yesterday!

{{HUGS}} mom's role is NEVER done it seems. Rachel you're doing great and you just need to continue although some days I can imagine how hard it would be to just maintain the stamina to do that. You have my heartfelt empathy and your son is blessed to have a mom like you.

Fawn

[rak1978]

Thanks, Fawn! I guess it does take a lot of stamina to raise children!!! Between the vomiting, potty training, and activities (soccer, church, school, etc...) we have been a little teensy bit busy lately.
I would not have it any other way though (other than the sick part). They bring me such joy.