[DeusXM]

Ok, this is rather awkward, but here goes...

I'm not 'ashamed' of having diabetes at all, but I am one of those people who doesn't wear their problems on their sleeve. I don't feel any sort of compulsion to broadcast to the world that I have diabetes in the same way other people will tell you before you've even asked that they have asthma or a peanut allergy or any one of the many afflictions that people seem to revel in. My issue is that once you let the cat out of the bag, you have to deal with all sorts of well-meaning but ultimately quite irritating people.

Basically if asked, I don't cover it up but otherwise it's just not an issue that I feel other people need to deal with. Having survived for 8 years pretty much 'on my own' so to speak (ie. I have never, ever needed assistance from anyone with managing my condition) I'm pretty used to being self-reliant and making sure that I don't need other people to get involved.

The thing is, I've just moved into a new houseshare with some strangers, who I get on really well with. The only thing is that I feel I should tell them something but unfortunately I've done the classic man thing. I waited for a good opportunity in the first week and it didn't come up, so I waited again. Now I've been there for a month and it sorta seems like I may have missed the sensible window of opportunity.

My problem is that I don't want to do a "Can we all sit down? I've got something to tell you..." but I can't really find a pressure-free window of opportunity. The best chance I had was yesterday when I bought a diet Coke but unfortunately one of my new housemates then said "drinking a girl's drink?" and I felt it might be slightly harsh to cut her down by saying "well actually, I'm diabetic so I can't drink the regular stuff without dying."

Basically then, I'm looking for suggestions about how to break the appalling news that the new housemate isn't in fact total and utter physical perfection, but without making it seem forced or confessional or something. Or, given that one of my housemates moves out this month and the other one goes in September, shall I just footle along as I've been doing and put things off indefinitely?

[trailrunner]

Maybe try " Oh hey guy's did I tell you i'm a diabetic? " just very casually. Maybe do a finger stick around them.

[corwin]

I don't have a good advice but I can share how I'm handling it. I mention it if it comes up. I never just met someone and said I'm diabetic just because I thought they need to know. If I need to inject\test near someone who doesn't know, or I need to refuse coke or something, or if it just come up in a conversation I'll say it. The way I see it, it's only a big deal if you make it so.

[Jaclyn]

Maybe just say when someone brings it up "oh I thought you all knew already" lol. I feel the same way. Ihavetn told anyone but my immediate family. Last week at my daughters bday party my best friend in the whole world since we were kids saw my meter box on the fridge and of course asked who was diabetic and looked at me with a weird smurk on her face. I got nurvous and said yum yum hummm I dont know (geez) I said maybe it was my mother in laws as she was at the house cleaning out her room she keeps storage in here (we have an extra bdrm) Im not ready to tell anyone yet. I think its just I dont want anyone to treat me diffrently. I feel really bad not telling her but one day i will when Im ready.

[jeggeman31]

If it was me, I would do one of 2 things

1st I would test my BS around them and then when they ask explain or
2nd I would (if it is possible) to all have a meal together and then inject in front of them, and then again explain once they look at you funny

[duck]

Burst into the room when they are all there, yell "You people are the UGLIEST group of people in the world!" And after that gets their attention, tell them.

Yeah, dude, you have a problem of sorts. Too bad Seinfeld isn't popular there, or else I could advise you to tell your roomies that you are in a "Mulva-situation", and that would break the ice...

More info on "Mulva": http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Jun...nfeld_episode)).

For what it's worth, I have yet to tell anyone I work closely with that I am a Type 1.

[DeusXM]

If it was me, I would do one of 2 things

1st I would test my BS around them and then when they ask explain or
2nd I would (if it is possible) to all have a meal together and then inject in front of them, and then again explain once they look at you funny

Yeah, this is the thing though. Those are very extreme steps in that they show all the body fluid parts of the condition. I'd rather not wave the dirty parts of diabetes in their faces, especially since I think a lot of people can cope better with "I have diabetes" rather than "Look at my blood!"

I dunno, guess I'll just have to keep ordering diet Coke until I get the question asked again and I have to make my housemate feel a bit sheepish.

[spike]

Originally Posted by DeusXM

Ok, this is rather awkward, but here goes...

I'm not 'ashamed' of having diabetes at all, but I am one of those people who doesn't wear their problems on their sleeve. I don't feel any sort of compulsion to broadcast to the world that I have diabetes in the same way other people will tell you before you've even asked that they have asthma or a peanut allergy or any one of the many afflictions that people seem to revel in. My issue is that once you let the cat out of the bag, you have to deal with all sorts of well-meaning but ultimately quite irritating people.

Basically if asked, I don't cover it up but otherwise it's just not an issue that I feel other people need to deal with. Having survived for 8 years pretty much 'on my own' so to speak (ie. I have never, ever needed assistance from anyone with managing my condition) I'm pretty used to being self-reliant and making sure that I don't need other people to get involved.

The thing is, I've just moved into a new houseshare with some strangers, who I get on really well with. The only thing is that I feel I should tell them something but unfortunately I've done the classic man thing. I waited for a good opportunity in the first week and it didn't come up, so I waited again. Now I've been there for a month and it sorta seems like I may have missed the sensible window of opportunity.

My problem is that I don't want to do a "Can we all sit down? I've got something to tell you..." but I can't really find a pressure-free window of opportunity. The best chance I had was yesterday when I bought a diet Coke but unfortunately one of my new housemates then said "drinking a girl's drink?" and I felt it might be slightly harsh to cut her down by saying "well actually, I'm diabetic so I can't drink the regular stuff without dying."

Basically then, I'm looking for suggestions about how to break the appalling news that the new housemate isn't in fact total and utter physical perfection, but without making it seem forced or confessional or something. Or, given that one of my housemates moves out this month and the other one goes in September, shall I just footle along as I've been doing and put things off indefinitely?

Nearly everyone I've ever met has a relative or friend who is diabetic, or is diabetic themselves. I wouldn't worry excessively about discussing your DM with your housemate.

[duck]

Originally Posted by DeusXM

Yeah, this is the thing though. Those are very extreme steps in that they show all the body fluid parts of the condition. I'd rather not wave the dirty parts of diabetes in their faces, especially since I think a lot of people can cope better with "I have diabetes" rather than "Look at my blood!"

I dunno, guess I'll just have to keep ordering diet Coke until I get the question asked again and I have to make my housemate feel a bit sheepish.

When it comes up and you tell them, just say "But I had you fooled that I was an otherwise normal human being!"

[poodlebone]

I never used to tell anyone either. I don't know if it was because I was ashamed, but more that I thought the other people would react badly and treat me differently. Now I have a pump, and it's usually visible. If anyone asks, I'll tell them what it is but I don't whip it out and start telling anyone why I have it. I only tell new people if it comes up.

I think the best thing to do would just leave your supplies, maybe just your meter and a pen, out where they can see it. You don't have to test around them and you don't even have to be near it. If there's a common area, just leave it out for a bit. Who knows, they may not even notice it!

[red]

I am a sorta-newly diagnosed Diabetc (since March) For those who I don't tell about my condition (for alot of the same reasons you mentioned), I just say that for my health I am watching carbs... they don't agree with me.

People have been really "generous" with their own help and opinios ;/ But whne I just say that I am watching carbs (ya know it was/is a new popular thing with Atkins and South Beach and such) folks get the picture.

In case of an emergency, in my wallet, I do have a card that says I am a diabetic.

[Stuboy]

Personally i would have used the diet coke opportunity! and i'd have said exactly what you didn't want to say..

A. because it's true
B. because it would make him think twice about saying something like that, and actually realise these drinks exist for a GOOD REASON.
C. i'd have just found it amusing and it's just my sarcastic sense of humour as well

Of course... You could level your pen and a tester kit laying around and when asked... whats this? explain...

or maybe leave your "I am diabetic" wallet card on the table?

[DeusXM]

Nearly everyone I've ever met has a relative or friend who is diabetic, or is diabetic themselves. I wouldn't worry excessively about discussing your DM with your housemate.

That's not really the issue though. Maybe I'm just really misfortunate but I'm one of those people who seems to end up getting all sorts of unsolicited 'advice' from people who find out I have diabetes - usually because they all know someone with T2. It gets a bit exasperating when everyone who you tell replies "Oh, my gran's diabetic. She does this, this and this..."

Maybe I'm just hypersensitive or judgemental or something.

[Lex4153]

I was thinking the same thing. Diet is not a "girlie" drink. As a woman I take offense to that. So men eat like **** and women don't? That doesn't make sense to me, lol.

I agree that it's not really anyone's business. But if something ever happened to you, your housemates need to know what to do in case of an emergency. A card in the wallet is good, but your wallet is not always on you. I'd leave something around that signifies you're diabetic. Or if someone is having something sweet, say nonchalantly, "Ah, I miss _______." Or something. It can just be brought up casually.

I haven't told my roommates. But all my friends and family know. My neighbor knows. My landlord knows. People I used to work with. It just came up somehow. I didn't sit anyone down and say, "We have to talk." It just came about.

Good luck and tell us how it goes!

[spike]

Originally Posted by DeusXM

That's not really the issue though. Maybe I'm just really misfortunate but I'm one of those people who seems to end up getting all sorts of unsolicited 'advice' from people who find out I have diabetes - usually because they all know someone with T2. It gets a bit exasperating when everyone who you tell replies "Oh, my gran's diabetic. She does this, this and this..."

Maybe I'm just hypersensitive or judgemental or something.

Tell them not all diabetics use the same therapy and you know what works for you and leave it at that. Or just let them tell their story and thank them...