[Eddy]

Originally Posted by rca9

Due to this discouragement I have pretty much stopped taking care of myself all together. However, now I just start feeling panicked about the future and totally depressed about everything.

Let me try twisting your mindset around and throwing it back at you. (I mean this in a helpful way, BTW.)

You're a perfectionist. If you can't achieve perfection, you want come as close as possible, yes? Even if you achieve only mediocre control, that's better than poor control.

Originally Posted by rca9

I guess my question is if this whole thing ever gets easier, do other people go through the same feelings of depression/discouragement at first?

I usually find a bad day/week discouraging. But there's not much one can do to undo the past... just gotta "reel it in" and keep going. Live and learn; learn, and live.

Hopefully you have helpful/understanding friends and family. However, even their understanding will be limited if they're non-D. Realize that, then stop on by DF when you need some understanding company.

[susique333]

When my diabetes returned last year (after diabetic pregnancies 10,12,14 years ago) I held this stupid thought that if only I "did everything right" I could once again shake this disease. When it was explained to me that, no, its not going away and yes, it will progress...first I resisted. Im super woman yanno, I can do anything! I would be good a few weeks, then eat a cookie just to double check that I did indeed still have diabetes! Talk about stupid. Now Ive come to terms with it and this forum is a big part in my accepting the diagnosis.

[MinimedPumper07]

I feel the same way. I feel incredibly depressed these days and I almost don't give a **** anymore. I am having surgery on my eyes and am also in college and controlling bgs is not easy. I need to find a way out of this depression. I am sick of feeling sorry and hopeless.

[Lulika]

Please dont slip into apathy and despair, rsca9 and Minimed. Yes, diabetes IS a pain in the behind, yes, it's not fair and we all have days when we just can't be bothered any more.
I am not preaching, truly I am not, but you are young and have your lives ahead of you. The alternative to this is WAY worse!
I went through severe depression last year, before I was diagnosed. I was really at the bottom of the heap and it took a diagnosis of diabetes to make me pull my socks up and start to live healthily. I had a tantrum this morning because my morning BG level was a tad over what I expected it to be....this is a real challenge but with all the help and support of this group, we will help you any way we can. Feel free to give me a shout any time...and don't worry, this too shall pass!

[GretchO]

My testimonial...I too was a perfectionist when I was first diagnosed as a Type 1, I went into overdrive with eating right, checking blood sugars constantly, exercising. My BS control was excellent, but it's really hard to maintain that level long term...it's a lot of hard work, under the best circumstances. I've been up and down, and on and off "the wagon" over the years. During pregnancy I was a star, post pregnancy I fell off the wagon in a huge way, just couldn't maintain it.

Rather than continuing to fight food, I decided to try to get it to work for me. I love food and love to cook, so found some diabetes-related cookbooks (Art of Cooking for the Diabetic is excellent, and there are tons more that's the only name I can think of right now). My family and friends LOVE the meals. The diabetic diet is really the healthiest there is. Also, some of the Food Network chefs (Ellie Krieger, nutritionist) have really well-balanced, healthy, easy, AND delicious recipes (stay away from Paula Deen though...love her, can't eat her food!).

Bottom line, it's good/helpful to find something you can focus some of your energy on - something that will help you in the long run (for me it was eating "diabetes right", but good tasting food) that can become fun rather than something you dread. And if you can get your friends and/or family on board, the more the merrier - they benefit, you benefit.

[ant hill]

Hey GretchO, That's the way to go. Diabetes is not the strict diet of 30 years ago as we have much better insulins now and the great advent of BG meters is a fantastic step forward in our control. Ho shure we have to look at what we should eat and practice good food habits and I am all for the good apple so chill out and relax.
It's nearly lunch here in the great southern land and there is a nice fresh roll and I will have in it ham with avocado red onion lettuce and some mustard. MMMmmm....YUM