[faeriefi]

Hi all,

I hate to seem like I'm moaning, but I'm having real problems with work and I could really use some advise.

I've been in my job for almost 2 years and I really enjoy it and get on with the people I work with. I work on a busy clinic that runs on a drop-in basis, so there's no telling how busy it'll be on any given day. The problem I've regularly had is getting the opportunity to have a break besides my 30 minute lunch in the middle of the day. Usually there are two of us to cover the clinic, each taking half the day and covering the other person's lunch and breaks. What my employers fail to understand is that I still need some kind of support when my co-worker is off, so that I can still take a break when I need one without the pressure of huge queues of people forming. I've raised the issue a couple of times and they sort of roll their eyes and try to accomodate me. Then the other day another colleague came up to me saying that they were scheduled to work with me one day, but they wanted to have the day off and the manager said they could only do that if I was "willing" to work on my own that day, with the implication that I'm work-shy and act a bit of a princess who doesn't want to be worked to hard. I was so upset by this; I'm not a manager, I'm not in charge of scheduling, so why in the world would they put the pressure on me to decide whether someone else can have the day off? I've explained the support I need from my employers and why I need it, so to be made to feel so incompetent was really upsetting. I know I have the right to get this support from my employers under the Disability Discrimination Act (UK) and eventhough I didn't need to, I told them from the point of interview that I have type 1 D and that I would neeed to be given regular breaks to help maintain my health.

I'm going to see my manager about this next week and want to be able to approach him in a clear, stable manner, but I'm so upset by this that I was hoping to get some advise about how to make my point without breaking down in tears or exploding with anger. I just feel really ridiculed and harrassed for being honest about my needs. I'm not overly comfortable with the idea of diabetes being a disability, but I can't imagine how I would be able to carry on in this job without the protection of the DDA, so I can understand why it has been classed as one.

I'm so sorry for ranting, I'm just at the end of my tether. Any help would be very appreciated. Thanks so much.

[Morris "Type 1"]

*offers hugs*


In my opinion, the only way to solve it, is to push very hard and embaress them.

It sucks, doesn't sound like it is in your nature to do, but is definitely required.

I don't know the law well, but the next thing I would do is write off to an organisation that helps to support people with disabilities and probably then start ringing into radio shows and things like that.

It's somewhat unrelated but a while ago I had a laptop problem, there was a mechanical fault which is entirely unrelated to the software I use. The shop told me that my machine is out of warranty because I changed the software and refused to help me.. on 3 occasions I was told the same thing, except you see, I had a friend video the conversation on the 3rd visit..

I created a website, posted it to a news website and within 3 days I received a letter from the person who refused me asking me to come in to "sort this out".

Needless to say I had a refund imediately.

Lets put it this way..

If I tried to suffocate you, would you fight for your life?

Well, what they are doing is slowly killing you unless you do something about it..

Remember this, managers are rarely any good at being managers and as such cannot be trusted to fulfill their role.

I have had trouble with being bullied at work before, It let me to being diagnosed as "acute stress reaction", in other words I ended up having depression and trying to kill myself.. why? Because every avenue I looked at seemed useless, no matter how many times I complained inside of the company nothing happened... That was the lesson I had to learn, when they are self regulating, nothing, whatever you do, can change anything.

Take it out to public and get as much support and help as you can externally, there are people who will be willing to stand by you.. I am a stranger and I woudln't hesitate to call them and tell them what I think.

Good luck, and I am so very sorry that you are having to experience this..

By the way, I was just thinking.. what would happen if you had a hypo as a result of this at work.

[SueM]

This link should help you out as you are in the UK.
Best wishes
Sue

[Scratch]

Originally Posted by SueM

This link should help you out as you are in the UK.
Best wishes
Sue

The board's software always seems to fail to retrieve a title for PDFs to use for the link text display, so to make SueM's link visible, I'll make the necessary adjustments.

www.diabetes-support.org.uk/Disability%20discrimination%20in%20the%20workplace .pdf

[ligawab]

My thoughts and prayers are with you. Don't feel bad for ranting. We are here to listen and offer advice and support.

I hope everything works out for you. Remember you need to put your health first.


ligawab (life is good and we are blessed)

[SueM]

Originally Posted by Scratch

The board's software always seems to fail to retrieve a title for PDFs to use for the link text display, so to make SueM's link visible, I'll make the necessary adjustments.

Thanks scratch

[zoelula]

I'm sorry you're going through this, it's wrong, wrong, wrong. What you do have control over, though, is "how they make you feel." Don't take this on emotionally. They are being jerks (and probably illegal, I don't know the labor laws in UK). You are not incompetent or a bad employee because you are diabetic and want to take care of yourself (need to do so!).

As for the meeting, I would do your homework and come prepared with written information about your legal rights from, as someone said, a reputable organization. If you belong to a union I would definitely consult with your union rep first. But I wouldn't start out with the legal stuff. I would start out with the human side. But I agree, that you should try and do whatever you can to not get mad or break down. Make notes and bring them with you so you clearly can go from point to point on what your needs are. Throw in that diabetes is considered a disability legally and you can even keep your written references in view so they know you mean business. Try and strike a tone of personal but firm. Then if they discount everything you say from that perspective, take a deep breath and bring out your legal references and tell them you plan to do what you need to do to fight this. Good luck and let us know how it goes.

[soso]

I sometimes find it is helpful to write all my points down and sort of learn them as if I were revising for a test or something.. even have discussions with yourself about it and others who are not involved.. this will release some of the tension you feel about the emotional aspect of it and help you to not forget any points.
I am sorry you are going through this, it sometimes seems it is impossible for others to imagine what is involved for us and our daily care, but we don't have the luxury of ignoring those needs.

[DanG]

Originally Posted by soso

...but we don't have the luxury of ignoring those needs.

Put yourself in the manager shoes.
If someone comes to you and D E M A N D S that a certain action be taken, your immediate reaction is to resist in any means at your disposal. As you are not the manager, your superior can refuse your demand in any manner realistic - such as reduce your time at that position, or remove you from the organization. An organization is just that - an organization. Like our body - it is a very good organization. When my skin refuses to work, I can accommodate that or remove it. When the islets of langerhans refuses to work, I can ignore that or accommodate that with use of insulin. Work with the organization, or it will do what it can without you. From what you have said, it sounds like they do not like to have a demanding person in that position, i.e. your are a princess that does not like to work too hard.

Prepare for the tough day that you will have as the only person at that position, and take less insulin and eat more so that you run a blood sugar that is high enough so that you will not need to fight the ultimate work no-no - i.e. you go low on the job, and by yourself. Hey, in the organization, you expect some accommodation, and you provide some accommodation as required. You are required to work alone one day - work alone one day - we know you can do that, you need to prepare accordingly and do it. Show them that you are not that princess that does not want to work too hard.

I am no manager, but I realize that as the world economy falls further into recession, a job is a good thing to fight for as much as you can so that you can keep your job. As such, in doing insulin and as part of a number of work organizations for 35 years, I never let anyone know about my insulin dependency - that is my private situation, I don't know their private situation, it is not something to make demands about.

A demand, by nature, does not allow another person to offer assistance, and then, as such, demands are resisted. I am sure that if you examine your life, when you can assist - you assist, but when you are demanded to assist, you resist. Assist because you can, but never demand, when you know you can live with a temporary situation. In this case, eat more for a day, live with a bit of a hight blood sugar, and correct when you are outside the organization. Once it becomes known that you are N O T a princess that does not want to work too hard - they will probably want to accommodate your needs which you have made known to them. Until then, live with a bit high blood sugar so you don't fail in that position, and correct that high blood sugar when you can. Temporary high blood sugar won't kill you, but try to live without a job might kill you.

[zoelula]

My sense wasn't that she is being demanding at all; quite the opposite.

[DanG]

Originally Posted by zoelula

My sense wasn't that she is being demanding at all; quite the opposite.

Put yourself in the shoes of the manager.
When you begin to hear reference to the DDA, it most certainly comes across as demand. Read what the original post said:

Originally Posted by faeriefi

What my employers fail to understand is that I still need some kind of support when my co-worker is off, so that I can still take a break when I need one without the pressure of huge queues of people forming. I've raised the issue a couple of times and they sort of roll their eyes and try to accomodate me.

Whether or not it is a demand, the manager is seeing the request as a demand - i.e. "roll their eyes" is certain indication that demand is being seen, plus, any reference to DDA is definitely demand. Need... demand... all sound the same when it becomes a "call" on the system.

[alura]

Maybe this is a simplistic question, but what do you do when you are alone in the clinic and need to take a necessary bathroom break? Surely your employers have something in place to allow you that. If so, can you attend to your diabetic needs at the same time?

[faeriefi]

Thank you everyone for your feedback and encouragement. Your kind words really have helped calm my nerves.
Sue M that document you sent was really useful in trying to figure out what would be a fair compromise for both me and my employer.
Dan G I do appreciate your comments and if this was a one-off then I would try to suck it up and just do my job. Unfortunately, I've done that too many times already as this problem has been on-going and I really don't like having to mistreat my body for the sake of their poor management. Also, as I work alone with vulnerable patients, I'm just not willing to get by under those conditions anymore. I've never felt the need to hide or apologise for the fact that I have diabetes and it's not a habit I really want to get into.
I think I'm ready to approach my department head tomorrow, but I'm going to approach him with a problem, not an argument. The head of department is quite a reasonable man and usually more willing to be proactive than my direct manager. I'm good at my job and it's in their favour to keep me. All I'm asking from them is to be able to do my job with dignity and to not be frowned upon for wanting to be able to take care of my health while I'm there. So, I am going to try a personal approach and not go into the DDA if I don't need to. I've come up with a couple of solutions that wouldn't cause a disturbance to the overall service, so fingers crossed they'll argee with one of those. I hate when things with simple resolutions get messy and hope I won't have to take it to that level.
Thank you again everyone, your support, understanding and advise is so very very helpful and appreciated.

[patricia52]

I am an office manager of a 2 girl office, and I try to make sure that the girl who works with me gets time off when she requests it. Why, because she is so good that I would not want to lose her and have to train someone else. Before you make too many requests, make sure that you are an employee that the manager would not want to replace., even it it means going out of your way to make sure that everything gets done in a neat and orderly fashion. Find ways to do your job better than anyone else. Make the manager so happy with your work that she/he will gladly do what it takes to keep you from leaving. It may even get her promoted and you may soon become the new manager.

[Ailsa]

Not quite sure how long a break you need for "huge queues to form?
What happens if you need to go to the loo?
I have been self employed in a retail store when no other staff were on & although it is not ideal, I have managed to get by.
These days it only takes 10 seconds to do a test.
I would usually keep some sweets under the counter. Small ones so I could eat them discretely if necessary.
Your employer will be influenced by who else is available. Is there anyone who can cover for you for a few minutes?
If not they will consider it a matter of practicality.
they should be considering your needs, but will also expect you to consider theirs.
As Dan G , I also do not generally tell employers about my condition - at least until I have been there for a while. I have a personal policy of never asking for special conditions regular staff do not have. The reason is that I believe it encourages employers to be predjudiced about employing others with D in the future if it is seen to have hassles for them.