[mia981]

i needs some support my boyfriend was recently diagnosed with type 2 in december- He was taking lantus and then 3 fast acting shots before meals. Do to a disagreement he moved out of a safe and clean environment, stopped caring and hasn't taking any insulin since late Feb, early March- he also stopped checking his blood. As of late he started going out more, drinking, smoking, smoking weed and eating tons of fast food- Then he completely changed over night, said he didn't want to see me and refused to take any calls from me or family members, The house where he is staying didn't know he was a diabetic, nor do most of his friends, he also got 2 tattoos within a months time, Im scared and worried- Now im not around to monitor his diet(he is 22) last 2 times i saw him he looked strange he skin was dry and peeling, he had crumbs all over his fast like he was ravishing food!, then a few days later it looked like he put on 3 pounds! What do i do- Is his lack of insulin and the drinking and smoking making him "crazy" is all i can do is wait- he hasn't been to the Drs. since he left the hospital and never refilled the insulin when he ran out in Feb... what do i do?

[princesslinda]

Hi Mia. Sounds like your boyfriend isn't very concerned about taking care of his diabetes at this point. Since he's not with you where you have some control over the environment, I don't see that there's a lot you can do to help his self-destructive behavior. I'm know how hard it is to watch someone you care about do things that are potentially harmful to his health.

On the flip side, I also know how hard it is to deal with diabetes day in and day out....it gets old fast. But, you do it so you'll hopefully have a healthy and long life.

Basically, taking care of himself or not is his choice, as he will be the one to suffer the consequences of his actions.

If you are close enough to him to talk and have him listen, let him know you care and are worried about him and wish he'd take better care of himself, but basically the decision is his, and his alone.

Sorry if this sounds cold, it's certainly not meant to. I sympathize with your situation.

[jerryn]

Sometimes you have to crash hard before you finally take care of yourself.

[barko]

Its hard to stand by and watch while someone you care about lets themselves go. I think we all go through that phase to some extent and at some point in the journey of diabetes. At least I know I have. Coming face-to-face with my own potential mortality and the loss of those I loved was the one thing it took to wake me up.

Not everyone has the same "wall", but we all have one. You can make sure to always be upbeat and available as a friend and to try and let him know that you care. You can also try getting a group of his closest family/ friends together to do a "crisis intervention" and confront him in love. But...that needs to be done with planning ;-) In any case, at the end of the day, it is his decision to be free or not.

I hope that he will find peace and that you will find the strength to continue being the incredible friend that it sounds like you have been.

blessings...

[ant hill]

I think that he is not taking it too well and he is crying fowl of what's happening to him. Being diagnised a diabetic is a tough thing to take and the things that he has to know will test him.
This is a phase that he is going through and pray that he comes out of his bingeing. So i wish you well Peter...

[desperado]

He is apparently young and that probably makes it worse . None of us want to be diabetic. I still find myself frustrated at shots and numbers . But I get over it and go on because I want to be around to see my family grow up.

Sounds like he is in denial and possibly at this point either don't give a rats bottom if he lives or dies and possibly is trying to push you out of his life.

On the other hand maybe you need to let him be in control of his meds and intake of food to make him be more aware of how to care for his self with this disease.

Not saying what he is doing is your fault just saying by helping him too much it may be disabling him. Sooner or later we all have to come to grips with this . PLease keep us posted on him. Jamie

[MJB]

He needs counseling from a professional.

If you and family members can have an "intervention" that is what he needs.

His current behavior is reckless and will likely result in severe physical problems that he deep down doesn't really want.

Best of luck to you and him.

[mia981]

we have been together for 4 years! since i wrote this he has left me for a 18yr old girl that he talks on the phone when im not around??? Im confused and hurt and come to find out he hasn' taken his insulin since January! he says his family nor i really love him and all he needs is this girl(who doesnt even know he is a diabetic?)what is going on with him? Is it really the lack of insulin or is he just a jerk? I dont know what to do-?

[owlyn]

He may be a diabetic, but that doesn't excuse his actions. You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. There are plenty of other guys out there. Don't waste your time. Move on.

[shabbie6247]

you should be commended for your care and love towards him, but its his body, if hes not prepared to look after it then why should you worry for him?
sorry to sound cold. but i would just walk away.

[Harold]

Diabetes or not he is a jerk. Known lots of them. Find someone that will appreciate a good women. All men have the jerk gene, but not all of them are stupid.