[slipperyelm]

Originally Posted by Hammer

Oh, about the cake....I went to throw it out....hated to throw out good food, so I ate the whole thing. It's been a long time since I've eaten that much sugar, so I checked my BG to see what that much sugar would do. My numbers shot up to 270 stayed there for about an hour, then it dropped to 119 and slowly decreased after that. I'll never do that again, but it was interesting to see the effect it had. Next time I'll just refuse the cake.

Well, thank goodness for Byetta. At least tell me-- was the cake any good?

That seems puzzling that you are so private about diabetes when you say it doesn't matter much, that it is just a fact.

[matingara]

i have no problem letting people know that i am diabetic and want to pro-actively manage my blood glucose by following a restricted carb diet. no probs at all.

however, the only time it has caused me some grief was this past Mother's Day.

We drove down to my wife's parent's house. a 1.5 hour drive.

because it was Mother's day, my Father-in-Law did the "catering" for lunch. i have explained to him several times about the low carb diet thing and he just does not get it!

anyway, he went to a great deal of trouble and made a HUGE platter of assorted white bread sandwiches. he also provided meat pies (basically beef stew encased in pastry) and sausage rolls (sausages in pastry). also, cake and other sugar-laden treats.

the only thing that i could vaguely approach was a small plate of cocktail franks and the cheese platter.

he offered me the sandwiches and i politely said "no". he gave me the line, "I checked with the bakery and they said that this bread has no added sugar - none at all". Yeah. OK.

i have explained to him at least twice about how carbs work and he is too set in his ways (I guess) to understand.

i made do with the franks and cheese. however, you can only eat so many!

i got in trouble from my family for being "un-gracious". told that i could have always "raided the pantry" to find something suitable!!! (no way i could do that...).

at the end of the day i said that in future i would bring along some portable low-carb snack food. but can you see that working? "Yeah - thanks for the sandwiches - but i'd rather have a couple of these chicken drumsticks that i just happened to prepare earlier and brought with me..."

i can see no way out of this "lose-lose" situation.



-- Joel.

[volleyball]

Originally Posted by matingara

i have no problem letting people know that i am diabetic and want to pro-actively manage my blood glucose by following a restricted carb diet. no probs at all.

however, the only time it has caused me some grief was this past Mother's Day.

We drove down to my wife's parent's house. a 1.5 hour drive.

because it was Mother's day, my Father-in-Law did the "catering" for lunch. i have explained to him several times about the low carb diet thing and he just does not get it!

anyway, he went to a great deal of trouble and made a HUGE platter of assorted white bread sandwiches. he also provided meat pies (basically beef stew encased in pastry) and sausage rolls (sausages in pastry). also, cake and other sugar-laden treats.

the only thing that i could vaguely approach was a small plate of cocktail franks and the cheese platter.

he offered me the sandwiches and i politely said "no". he gave me the line, "I checked with the bakery and they said that this bread has no added sugar - none at all". Yeah. OK.

i got in trouble from my family for being "un-gracious". told that i could have always "raided the pantry" to find something suitable!!! (no way i could do that...).


i can see no way out of this "lose-lose" situation.



-- Joel.

What's wrong about being ungracious? Would they expect a recovering alcoholic to tip back a few because they were at someone else's home? If they did, I would consider them ungracious. A good host should take the needs of ALL their guests. And where is your wife, she should be on your side, is she looking forward to taking care of you when you are sick?

[Hammer]

Originally Posted by slipperyelm

Well, thank goodness for Byetta. At least tell me-- was the cake any good?

That seems puzzling that you are so private about diabetes when you say it doesn't matter much, that it is just a fact.

First, the cake was okay. I made a cup of decaf coffee to go with it. I don't care for sweets...I rarely eat anything sweet. Eating a whole cake is something I've never done, but I figured that if I just ate one piece now and another piece tomorrow, I'd be stretching out the big carb hit to my system, so why not just have one big carb hit and get it over with. A number like 270 is the highest I've been since I started the Lantus and Byetta. I'm glad it didn't last too long, but at least now I know what eating like that will do to my numbers. I'm sure in the future, I'll test other foods to see what they do to my numbers also.

When I say I don't care, I mean that I don't care that I have all these ailments. I don't tell people that I have them because it's a sign of weakness for a man to discuss his problems with others. Yes, that's an old fashioned way of thinking, but that's me. I know it's only TV but how many times do you see men sharing their feelings about anything on TV? Never, because that's not the manly thing to do. We are not women....we don't tell each other what's bothering us like women do. Sorry, but that's the way my generation was brought up and I feel very strongly about that. You have to deal with it as best you can on your own, and that's what I do....that's what I've always done.

[matingara]

Originally Posted by volleyball

What's wrong about being ungracious? Would they expect a recovering alcoholic to tip back a few because they were at someone else's home? If they did, I would consider them ungracious. A good host should take the needs of ALL their guests. And where is your wife, she should be on your side, is she looking forward to taking care of you when you are sick?

good points! and hard to explain without a whole long story.

firstly, it didn't cross my mind to "raid the pantry".

when my mother-in-law is the host she goes out of the way to please me and my requirements. but this was Mother's Day and the F-i-L decided he should do all the work and he has no idea about my special needs (even though i have explained it several times).

my wife was there, but there was an awful lot of other stuff going on that day. (this is the long story of which i speak.) to be honest i don't think she took any notice of the food. it was just one of those situations.

i was quite happy to stick to a plate or two of franks and cheese.

my point is that, in the future, i need to be more prepared for the assault of the all-carb menu (i.e. like having something tucked away that is suitable for me).

so far i have been OK - even in restaurant situations. there always seems to be at least one low carb choice.



-- Joel.

[volleyball]

Originally Posted by Hammer

but I figured that if I just ate one piece now and another piece tomorrow, I'd be stretching out the big carb hit to my system, so why not just have one big carb hit and get it over with.
When I say I don't care, I mean that I don't care that I have all these ailments.

If you don't like a sweet, it makes it easy for me to toss, I'll indulge but it's got to be worth it.
And if you cut the cake into 16 pieces and had 1 a day, the hit would be so small you may not notice and you would have been sick of it or it went bad before it was all gone.
Eating it all seems to be a defeetest attitude that may need work on, maybe not, I don't know you, just the way it came across in your post

If your mom eats right herself, then telling her that she will be loving the family more if she feeds the family in a healthy way. You do NEED to come clean with your diabetes to her, if you cannot, message me her name and phone number and I'll call her.

Originally Posted by matingara

good points! and hard to explain without a whole long story.

-- Joel.

I'm sure you do fine most of the time, just needed some reassurance for a difficult situation.

[slipperyelm]

Are we talking about a whole cake here? I thought it was just one slice.

Hammer, men discuss problems all the time. There would be no progress in humanity whatsoever if people, including men, did not discuss problems. What's the big deal?

And as for the observation about tv, well, yes I do see men on tv talking about problems--in situation comedies, in cartoons, in dramas, in news magazine programs, in talk shows, on the evening news, in court programs..... all the time.

Of course, you can keep to yourself the information that you are diabetic, but it does not give you any kind of advantage. You seem to have this reluctance and fear of being perceived as not in control as a major personality feature. My goodness, you even expressed it in quite Freudian terms in describing how you learned to stuff you own emotions and hold everything into your bowels!

????????

[Hammer]

I guess I was raised differently then. There are many things that a man should never discuss, lest he be though of to be weak or soft. Yes, men will tell other men some things, but it's never at a deep level, it's just superficial. If a man has low self esteem, and is shy around women, he won't tell his friends that he's shy or lacks confidence around women, and that maybe his shyness comes from when he was a child his mother never hugged him and kissed him when he needed a hug, so he felt alienated by women, and it now manifests itself in his inability to approach women. Try saying THAT around the guys and see what their reaction is.

No, what he will relate to the guys is that he's nervous around women, so he avoids them.....end of conversation! NO man will ever relate his innermost feelings to ANYONE. Sorry, but I don't believe any man here would ever do that. It would serve no purpose, and you'd come across as weak or unmanly or whatever you want to call it.(at least if you're from my generation.)

Also, keeping your problems to yourself may be considered "bottling it up" to some people, but if you work out the problems on your own, it makes you more self reliant....you feel good about yourself. The satisfaction you get from doing it yourself releases any so called bottled up emotions. You've been through it before, you didn't need any help, and you survived. That's not to say that you may need a hand to move something or you may need someone to give you a ride if your car breaks down, that's okay.The thing is, you try every way possible to do it yourself, and if you can't, then you get whatever help you need. As long as you can do it yourself, then you do it.

Again, I don't see why it's so important that I tell my mother or my family. What good could that possibly do? They can't do anything for me that I'm not already doing for myself. Caring? Comforting? I don't need those things....I never have. Telling them only has a downside....they would worry, for one. Another aspect is that if the Lantus and Byetta become a hassle for me, I'll just stop taking it like I did with the metformin and amaryl. If I stop taking everything, I don't want anyone pestering me to take something, like my family would. If that happened, I'd stop visiting them. If I decide to stop treating my diabetes or any other ailments I might get, that's my decision to make and I don't want family members worrying over me.

I don't lie to my family or friends, I just don't tell them everything about my life. I remember seeing an episode of "Friends" that really put this into perspective. For those of you who watched Friends, you'll remember this: Ross and Rachel had finally spent their first night together. When Rachel got home, Monica and Phoebe asked her where she'd been all night. She said that she spent the night with Ross. The other two girls immediately dropped what they were doing, pulled up chairs and told her to sit down and tell them everything. They wanted to know all the juicy details. That's what women do.

Ross came home and Joey and Chandler were watching a ball game on TV. They asked Ross where he'd been all night, and he said that he spent the night with Rachel. The two guys didn't take their eyes off of the ball game, and one of them said, "Get any?" Ross was staring at the TV and said. "Yeah." Joey, still looking at the TV said, "Kool." and that was the end of the conversation. That's what men do. Men don't need to get any deeper than that when it comes to personal issues.

Oh, yes, it was a whole cake, but keep in mind these are not full sized cakes. They are maybe 8 inches in diameter with a hole in the middle. No, I could never eat a whole full sized cake....well, maybe I could, but I'd never want to. If I had to guess, I'd say that the cake was only the second sweet food that I've eaten this year. I think I had a few chocolate chip cookies about a month ago. I avoid sweets because I prefer to eat good food....meat, vegetables, etc. I rarely eat bread either. I can get sweets and bread anywhere, but good food I can't, so I avoid sweets in favor of good food. The cake was a rare situation that was thrown at me, and being a person who hates to waste food, I just ate it. Next time, I'll use one of the suggestions that you all posted here to avoid having to throw it out. If I hadn't been waiting so long for my food and if there weren't cars behind me waiting, I'd probably have gone into the store and returned it. It just happened so fast that I didn't think.

[Hammer]

Here's a picture of the cake....in case anyone was wondering. Hey, that's pretty neat...you can get the nutritional information from that site. It doesn't say how many servings the cake has though. I think it was 6 servings, so I guess multiply those numbers by 6.

[volleyball]

You said you wanted it straight. And to avoid the censors.
YOU ARE FULL OF P00PIE!!!!
Either you are pulling our legs for your jollies or you are in need of a kick in the pants, you decide.
You get your life lessons from the TV show "Friends":? What's real life about that?
Men do share their feelings, just not to the extent of women, and to their closest friend or farthest stranger. Most don't express themselves like the men in video who do mainly because we don't have women writers writing our lines. Men express as much as women just not in so many words.
Nobody lives with you, they are all far away but you don't want to tell them as they will complain that you are not taking your medicine, well, how are going to know? And if you are too lax to take care of yourself, you deserve to be yelled at.
You tell your family because you love them, if you do not, you do not love them, plain and simple. They find out when you kick the bucket prematurely that you did not confide in them and they will hate you for that. Why leave them that memory.

You may be depressed and feeling sorry for yourself. Take your medicine, throw away the bad food and exercise. You have all day to work out. Exercise is free. Walk, run, bike or help the elderly person down the street with something they cannot do.

You say you are this macho man who hides his feelings. Well, the macho man first rule is to take care of everyone and you are taking care of no one, not even yourself.

[Janlaton]

If you don't want to eat it or throw it out, try taking the cake to work or to someone who will eat it. I am forever showing up at work with stuff I can not eat that someone gives me. My young skinny coworkers love it!

My family all are very supportive of me and stay on my case about what I eat so they do not prepare desserts for me unless it is sugar free or fruit. They just do not understand they still have carbs. I think just about everyone knows I am diabetic and I have blacked out just about everywhere so most people are always saying 'do not eat that." I love the attention and that people care enought about me to watch out for what I eat.

[Mama2Two]

Hammer... I'm fairly new to this site, and haven't posted much, but I can definitely sympathize. I'm half Sicilian...and everyone on that side of the family LOVES food...myself included. My Grandma Antonina used to cook like your mom cooks, multiple entrées, 7 courses, multiple desserts...and she'd get insulted if you didn't try a little of everything. Then, after my third dessert, she'd whisper, "Lisa, you really should try to lose some weight. You have such a pretty face!" Ugh...I hated that part of the meal!

Anyway, my main reason for writing today is with regard to IBS. I had it for YEARS. At first I thought it was due to me taking 2400 mg of Guaifenisen (a mucus thinner) per day for my sinuses. But it continued even after I stopped that, and actually seemed to be mostly after I ate. Since I ate constantly...I had IBS constantly (10-12 times per day)...but I noticed the correlation in October when I had to fast before gallbladder surgery. One night shortly after that, during a bout of insomnia, I saw a medical show about something called Habba Syndrome. Apparently with Habba Syndrome, every time one eats, the liver pumps out way too much bile into the intestines, and this causes diarrhea, usually within about 20 minutes of eating. I went to the website, habbasyndrome.com - About Dr Habba , and did some reading. I then mentioned it to my doctor, and he agreed to prescribe Cholestyeramine. It's a cholesterol medication which apparently binds with the bile, stopping the diarrhea and lowering the cholesterol. He said since my cholesterol had creeped up in the last year, that it couldn't hurt to try it.

Well...let me tell you...I'm like a different person! Within 48 hours of starting this medication, the IBS was GONE for the first time in 20+ years.

You mentioned that your IBS has resolved with lower BG levels...could it be because you're eating less?

If any of this sounds like what you've gone through, you may want to mention it to your doctor.

[slipperyelm]

Cool. We discuss a problem and learn something potentially helpful. Habba Syndrome. Thanks, Mama2Two. I know it has to be tremendous relief to have found that remedy!

[Mama2Two]

Originally Posted by slipperyelm

Cool. We discuss a problem and learn something potentially helpful. Habba Syndrome. Thanks, Mama2Two. I know it has to be tremendous relief to have found that remedy!

Oh, you have no idea! I was actually planning my day around where I could find a bathroom. It's hard having 2 little kids, and having to run to a ladies room 10-12 times per day. Plus, it's not a good thing to have to do that during a busy work day. That program and website saved my sanity.

[volleyball]

Welcome Lisa, I don't think I greeted you here before. You've made yourself very valuable here with that bit of information. That is why I encourage all member to post messages.