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xpDiabetes

Need urgent help Please

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xpDiabetes

Since June I lost like 15 lbs. I am severely depressed during this time. All blood tests showed normal except cholesterol.  MY TSH is like 1.7 which is in normal range. But doctor said it is on the lower side, we may have to check that after 3 months.

Also, I am getting bored of this daily grind of wake up - brush - shower - eat - work - eat - sleep. 

Work place is very stressful.

And at this age, I got attracted to a friend of my mine.  There is no path forward in that direction.  I want to stop thiniking about her. But the progress is slow.   I think that is also contributing to the depression.

I feel that I am not courageous person.  I am thinking about getting phychotherapy. Does it work ?  How can i become more courageous ? 

 

 

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OneEye

It seems, from what little information you've provided, you have an acute, maybe chronic, case of apathy...the worst disease. There's an old saw, "All work and no play makes X a dull boy!" Falling into a rut is easy. Getting out doesn't take courage...it just takes a little more energy than maybe you're willing to put out.

 

It's not uncommon to feel we've worked ourselves into a corner now and again. Getting out of that corner only requires a little bit more desire with the belief that there's light at the end if the tunnel. Asking for help is a start...good for you.

 

Your comment reminds of a movie I watch whenever it comes on. It's called Groundhog Day (synopsis). I'm not comparing you to the title character...just his predicament. On a media assignment...he finds himself waking each day to the same day, over and over and over...until he decides to change the narrative and become a better "himself"...which finally breaks the cycle. The key to overcoming apathy is motivation. The genuine desire to make your life more interesting.

 

Myself...and others have been where you are. I'm not just spitballing here. To get out of a rut you first have to get pissed off at yourself for being there. That provides motivation. Get mad! Get real mad! Then...get busy.

 

As to the lady? That is attainable. Not who you are now...but who you'll become. Getting stronger builds character; building character builds confidence; building confidence makes you the man. If you believe in yourself...so will everyone else.

 

Good luck...:top:

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Kit

You might also consider looking at a behavioral therapist.

 

Its easy to fall into ruts of both action, inaction, and in thought itself.  A behavioral therapist can help identify these areas and help break out of the unproductive or harmful patterns.

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Hammer
9 hours ago, xpDiabetes said:

Since June I lost like 15 lbs. I am severely depressed during this time. All blood tests showed normal except cholesterol.  MY TSH is like 1.7 which is in normal range. But doctor said it is on the lower side, we may have to check that after 3 months.

Also, I am getting bored of this daily grind of wake up - brush - shower - eat - work - eat - sleep. 

Work place is very stressful.

And at this age, I got attracted to a friend of my mine.  There is no path forward in that direction.  I want to stop thiniking about her. But the progress is slow.   I think that is also contributing to the depression.

I feel that I am not courageous person.  I am thinking about getting phychotherapy. Does it work ?  How can i become more courageous ? 

 

 

My TSH was just tested, and it was 1.21, which my doctor said was good, because they want it to be close to 1.0.  As for the depression, depression is typically caused by a chemical imbalance in your brain.  Correcting that chemical imbalance usually relieves the depression.  Maybe ask your doctor about an SSRI (Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor), such as citalopram, which is a drug that increases the serotonin levels in your brain.  Increasing the serotonin levels in your brain should stop the depression.

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xpDiabetes

Thank you all for the replies. 

 

Sorry my TSH is 0.72 not 1.7.  At one time, my doctor prescribed Lexapro. But I read the side effects and stopped using it after the send day.  Soon after using it, I started feeling sleepy in the night.  This time, I want to ask my doctor to give me Welbutrin.  The side effects are still scary.. but I hope it provides a better life.

 

I took Restyl (got from my mom) for a day and am feeling better than the day before.  The heartburn kind of feeling is a bit relieved.  Dont know  how long it lasts or if I have to continue to take it. 

 

One Eye :  I read your message multiple times yesterday. I will contine to read it again and again.  I really felt good. I also started watching groundhog day.. But fell asleep in the middle.  Will continue today.

 

Does hypnotism work ?  Can I get hypnotized to become more positive or forget some of the past events ?  Did anyone try Hypnotism ?  I am surely going to see a psychatrist..

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OneEye

With all due respects to Hammer's suggestion...and your thoughts that Welbutrin [SIC] might be effective...I would find out if this is really clinical depression or your life kinda sucks in general, from your point of view. My neighbor smokes weed all day long. That's his cure to his "depression". It makes him feel better...but the apathy it brings on does nothing to change his life. It's a vicious circle and expensive self-medication.

 

The point I'm trying to make here is: Will SSRIs make your life appear better, although, in reality, from anyone else's point of view, they'd be depressed as well were it their life. Or, will the SSRIs give you a clearer outlook on your life and help you change what depresses you? I have no idea...I'm not a clinical psychologist. My sister's been going to a therapist for years now. I notice zero change in her. She says it makes her feel better to have someone "to talk to". Semantics! Actually, it's someone to "unload on"...she's my sister...I know the difference. Anyway...

 

" Does hypnotism work ?  Can I get hypnotized to become more positive or forget some of the past events?"

 

Good question. While at Fort Bragg (Special Forces Training) I learned how to hypnotize. After class, back at the barracks, we played around a bit with it. Finding out...it was nothing to play around with. Would it make you more positive or forget some of the past events? I dunno; the mind is a very, very complex organ, my opinion would be don't go muckin' about with it. I found that any hypnotic suggestions had little to no longevity.

 

 

 

 

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adiantum

 OneEye has given great advice & even identified the mood I'm in... these ruts can creep up no matter what age.

Thanks OneEye... 👌

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Hammer

The reason that I mentioned asking your doctor for an SSRI, is because, I was taking one (citalopram) for a while and it helped.  While I wasn't exactly depressed (I don't get happy or sad or depressed or anything else, but that's another story), what I was feeling was extreme anxiety from time to time, and the anxiety only last for a few seconds, so my doctor prescribed citalopram.  For some reason, and no one knows why, your brain can develop a chemical imbalance, and when that happens, you can get depressed for apparently no reason.  When it happened to me, I had no idea what was happening, I only knew that when I went to bed, my heart felt like it was racing, and I was unable to fall asleep.  Staying awake all night, then getting up to go to work the next day (I was working in construction back then) there was no way that I had the energy to go to work, so instead, I went to the hospital to find out what was going on.  They examined me and said that there was nothing wrong with me, which made me mad because, if there was nothing wrong with me, then why was my heart beating so fast that I couldn't fall asleep.  They turned me around so that I could see the heart monitor and my heart wasn't beating too fast, it just felt like that to me.  They gave me a few Vicodin tablets and told me to see my family doctor which I did.  I took one Vicodin tablet and slept for 15 hours.  The next day, I saw my doctor and he prescribed the citalopram.  That solved the problem, only I didn't like the side effects, which a lot of people don't get from this drug.  The side effects made me sweat excessively, and I mean excessively, so I stopped taking it.

 

Anyway, depression can be treated with SSRI drugs.  There is no reason to suffer from depression if it can be treated with medicine.  If an SSRI can make your life better, why not ask your doctor for one?  If it doesn't work for you, then you can always stop taking it.

Edited by Hammer

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meyery2k

This is a difficult subject to be sure.

 

I can only share my own experiences.  My mother suffered through depression for a good deal of her life.  She tried using alcohol to help dull the pain.  Later in her life, she found a good therapist.  In combination with medication, it helped her for a while.  She then fell back into old habits and, when her life ended was in a place where she was better than earlier in her life but not as far as she had progressed.

 

My older daughter suffers from manic-depressive disorder.  When she is manic, life couldn't be better.  When the depressive cycle kicks in, she thinks about killing herself.  Therapy and medicine have helped her greatly.  She recognizes, and acknowledges, the neither state is good and has learned to adjust accordingly as she cycles through the phases.  It is never easy but she has come a long, long way.

 

We believe my grandfather also suffered with depression much like my mother.

 

I go through what I think of as blue, or sometimes cloudy, phases.  I take care of myself, I do things, I socialize, but I just don't feel the internal energy or zip that I usually do.  I recently went through one of these.  I consider talking to a doctor when I go through these but they seem to self resolve and I don't want to do anything when I feel "right" the other 99% of the time.  When I am cloudy I find it is a good time to shake things up in my life a little and that often helps shorten the period.

 

I think the right answer to your question might be "E) All of the above".  It certainly would not hurt to look into them.

 

One thing that helps me is communication regularly with friends.  If we need to be those friends you would like to communicate with, then please let us know how you are doing. ~ Mike

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xpDiabetes

Thank you for all your responses. I feel a notch better than last week.  The only thing I did was to force myself to eat a bit more than what I feel like eating.  All the above messages seem to apply to me.  Sometimes, I think of suicide, but I will not do that and cause trauma to my kids.  They still dont know how the world works.  My dad passed away relatively early in my age and I still did not recover from his loss even after 20 years.  I dont want my kids to go through that because of me.   The problem is definitely internal.  99% of people would be happy if they had my life.  I also came across a group of friends, who act as if they are family and talk very sweetly, but dump you in a second.  That causes me to question why I should have been attached to them in the first place. I am afraid of medications and their side effects.  But this time, I may have to take SSRI.  I was prescribed Lexapro but i stopped taking it after a day or two, after reading the side effects.  I will post more details about my journey.  I will do something about my condition.

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OneEye
22 minutes ago, xpDiabetes said:

 I will do something about my condition.

 

Gonna hold you to that.

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Kit

I'm not really a pro medication type person, but at the same time, I'm not against them either if they are necessary.  In regards to side affects, I tend to look at it this way.

 

While looking at side affects and interactions is important, you are not guaranteed to get all of them, or even any of them.  Its a case of everyone reacts differently.  And Lexapro might not even be the SSRI for you.  You might have to go through a number of types before you find the one that works best for you.

 

Also, are the possible side affects better or worse than what you are going through now.  While you say you won't do it, do you really think its normal to be thinking about suicide?

 

I'm currently on Lexapro, though for an off label use (hot flashes).  I've had two side affects.  A mild increase in appetite and the absolute and utter death of any sex drive.  Honestly the mild increase in appetite is something I can deal with somewhat easily.  As for sex drive, well utter lack of the ability to sleep, night after night after night of misery and days of exhaustion, and similar were all killing my sex drive anyway.  I figure loss of sex drive is tolerable if it means I can get decent sleep.

 

Another important factor is the affect depression and anxiety can have on those around you.  Helping yourself helps those close to you as well.

 

Another thing to keep in mind.  There is no magic pill (SSRIs or otherwise) which are just going to make things all better.  An SSRI can help, but if there are underlying issues, drugs won't do diddly about those.  Those are actions you have to take yourself.  The SSRI, however, will make it easier for you to do so.

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xpDiabetes

I was in and out of ED many times. I used to be 175 lbs.  When I got diabetes and came down to 150 lbs, I started having a good sex life. I stopped lexapro exactly for the side effects of ED, as I considered that it will cause more depression.  My wife is saying that if I get better, ED should not matter. She is asking me to use the drug.  Without the drug,  I noticed Yoga is helping me.  But it is a time taking exercise.  When I do Yoga even for  2 days a week, my sex drive is very good.  But that is only a part of story about side effects.   I was advised by a doctor to consider Wellbutrin. I am having an endoscopy tomorrow to diagnose my appetite issues. Will finish that and then when I meet the doctor, I will ask him to prescribe Wellbutrin.  May be as soon as this week.  

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meyery2k

I notice that even when I have my cloudy periods, cycling offers temporary relief while performing and for several hours after.  Perhaps yoga has this effect for you.  I feel much greater satisfaction after cycling 2 hours than binge watching something for 2 hours, that's for sure.

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xpDiabetes

Endoscope results are clean. No issues. My doctor is asking to take SSRI instead of Wellbutrin.  He is saying Wellbutrin causes weight loss and that could cause more concern as this whole episode started with weight loss concerns.   He said he will discuss with me soon and decide a course of action. 

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xpDiabetes

Wish you all a Great Weekend.  I have one question regarding blood pressure.  My BP used to be 95/65 range. Suddenly in the last reading I got 120/80. Given that I lost weight, is there anything to be concerned about ?

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TX_Clint

Your bp appears to still be in a normal range. I would just maintain what you are doing with regards to bp and be happy.

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